


She's Like The Wind

by Panstick



Category: AUSTEN Jane - Works, Sanditon (TV 2019), Sanditon - Jane Austen
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:35:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 32,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23843842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Panstick/pseuds/Panstick
Summary: Charlotte Heywood moves in next door to Sidney Parker, who falls deeply in love very quickly.There is a lot of touching and longing before they finally realize they belong together.
Relationships: Charlotte Heywood & Sidney Parker, Charlotte Heywood/Sidney Parker
Comments: 80
Kudos: 258





	1. She doesn’t know what she’s done

**Author's Note:**

> I saw Sanditon at the beginning of the lock down and really hated the ending, how could they? This is a modern COVID19 take on the relationship between our dear couple. I have been totally untrue to the family relations in the series. Title's are borrowed from She's Like the Wind by Patrick Swayze.

Sanditon Terrace was a newly restored historic building in a new and upcoming part of New York. It used to be quite a rough neighborhood toughened by generations of sailors and harbor workers. But the sea front had attracted the creative class and slowly softened the area. Charlotte Heywood had been there before to visit her Godmother, but now she was going to live here – a long distance from the safe known surroundings of Willingden, England. The doorman helped her carry her bags and camera cases to the elevator but she smilingly turned down his offer to help her any further. 

“Are you the new assistant?”, the voice was brute boarder lining to rude. 

She looked up from her cases and boxes in the elevator and looked straight into a pair of arrogant and… admittedly very beautiful brown eyes. The man was tall, well-build, with a frowning and displeased look in his face. Sharp eyebrows and beautiful brown hair. He was dressed in a pristine 3-piece suite and a crisp white shirt unbuttoned at the collar. She noticed a bit of bare bronzed skin. Despite being tired from the long flight from England and finally reaching her new home with her heavy luggage she stood up and bravely gave him her hand, smiled and starred him in the eyes and answered, “No, I’m Charlotte Heywood. I’m moving in”. Her big brown eyes and bright smile – though strained – gave him a light suction in his loins. She was very pretty but not a classic beauty like the women he normally dated. But her big brown eyes sparkled. They were intelligent, curious, innocent and stubborn just to mention some of their qualities. She was altogether different and unlike anyone he had met before. And, she didn’t seem to be at all impressed by him. That was new to him and she made him feel utterly confused and insecure. He realized he was still holding her hand, “Well, hello. I am Sidney Parker. Your new neighbor”. She didn’t quite react as he had expected (or hoped for if he had to be honest with himself), “Hello, Mr Parker. Nice to meet you. Would you please either step aside or give me a hand?”. 

Sidney helped her into the apartment, curious, intrigued and slightly annoyed that a stranger had made such an impact on him. He didn’t want to get involved with her but still heard himself striking up conversation about what she did for a living and so on. After a few minutes he learned that his new neighbor, Charlotte was from a small town, Willingden, in England, moved to New York to be closer to most of her clients and that she was a photographer. “And you? What do you do for a living?” Charlotte’s voice was genuinely interested, soft and innocent. She looked at Sidney wondering what she could have said that made him look at her like she was from another planet. 

“I’m an actor…and…erhm…” he replied not sure how to express his surprise that the number one sexiest bachelor in Hollywood somehow had escaped the attention of an adorable girl with sparkling brown eyes and soft chocolate colored curls from a small village in England. Instead he headed for the door mumbling “I have taken up enough of your time and must return to my party”. And then he was gone. 

Charlotte looked around in the apartment. It seemed so much bigger than when her Godmother lived here. Of course, it was almost emptied for Lady Denham’s heavy and crowded collection of furniture and paintings, but mostly she realized the step she had taken in her adult life and right now it seemed quite overwhelming and she felt a pang of homesickness. 

It was well past 3 AM when the last guest left Sidney’s afterparty. Some of them clearly anticipating the infamous bachelor’s bed and body. Truth was that Sidney had grown weary of that lifestyle after spending his first years of fame in a haze of women and alcohol, spiced up with underground fight clubs when he couldn’t stand the sight of himself in the mirror. The fighting at least made him feel something. The last guest had practically thrown herself at him and by that removed the last desire he might have felt for a quick fuck. He had to push her into the elevator to get her to leave. Annoyed and tired he leaned against the wall in the hallway thinking about his new neighbor and scolding himself for it, when he picked up the melancholy sound of a cello from Charlotte’s apartment. Like a moth to a flame Sidney found himself drawn to the music and stood there for a while with his forehead leaned against her front door. 

The cello was her go-to-instrument whenever Charlotte felt sad or out of sorts. And even though she was by no means a virtuoso on any instrument, her playing had an honesty and sincerity that made it beautiful to listen to. Charlotte herself was of course not aware of this herself but Sidney felt it from the hallway between the two apartments on the building's penthouse. She almost overheard the soft knock on the door but finally heard and went to open and expected to be scolded by the arrogant man next door for disturbing his party. It turned out that Mr. Sidney Parker wasn’t there to complain about the music, he held up two glasses and a bottle of brandy “Looks like we both can’t sleep, Miss Heywood. May I join you for a night cap and apologize for my rude welcome to Sanditon Terrace?” Charlotte felt annoyed at the intrusion at first but the sincere look on his face made her lower her shoulders and invite him in. Sidney noticed a beautiful pair of bronzed legs under the blue kimono. Her feet were bare and he wanted to kiss and lick every adorable toe. 

They sat in a couple of chairs from Lady Denham and Sidney poured two solid glasses of brandy and handed her one. Their fingers met and Charlotte gasped at the electricity from the touch. Sidney cleared his throat and felt slightly hot. What was it about that woman that stirred up something in him, he thought he had buried long time ago? He was very content to live his life in safe distance of… women like Charlotte. And somehow, he couldn’t help gazing at her. Despite all, Charlotte and Sidney ended up having a surprisingly wonderful time. Charlotte told him how the old Lady Denham, her Godmother and a dear friend of her grandmother, had left her the apartment and urged her to challenge the boundaries of her comfort zone. He told her how he stumbled into acting because of a girlfriend he had, when he finished his medical training as a doctor. She in return was quite embarrassed that she had never seen any of his movies nor heard of him. After a few hours of the most rewarding conversation Sidney had had in long time, he gently said that he might have overstayed his welcome, and that she deserved to go to sleep. He ended up bowing goodbye but really, he just wanted to kiss that delicate lower lip.


	2. Can’t look in her eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sidney is helping Charlotte out and falling even more in love in the process

Charlotte was busy. First thing on her agenda was to set up her studio and dark chamber in the apartment. Slowly the apartment started to look and feel like a home. Her home. All in all, she felt in control of her new life. Her new neighbor though was a completely different matter. They seemed to bump into each other all the time and everywhere, “am I never to get away from you?” he had asked one of the first mornings they literally bumped heads her leaving and him entering the elevator. 

Swearing inside over his tough reaction he had apologized for bruising her forehead and had insisted on checking her, allowing himself to look into her beautiful sparkling eyes and stroking his thumb carefully and gently over the soft skin on her forehead. She smelled like summer rain, citrus, honey and… naked skin. He could still feel her in his arms as he caught her from stumbling and held her tight for just a second. 

They shared the mixed feeling of annoyance and attraction, clinging on to first emotion. Sidney reluctantly had to admit to himself that most of the times they met in the hallway wasn’t coincidental at all. His instincts had quickly registered her habits and favorite places to walk or enjoy a cup of piping hot tea. And so, they continued for several weeks until Sidney finally realized that he was in love. 

Unknowingly of her neighbor’s feelings for her, Charlotte continued to build her daily routines and seeing clients in her studio. She was quite pleased with herself. Eventually she even started to enjoy the coincidental meetings with Sidney, their walks by the sea front and just sitting on the café on the corner and chat while watching people go by. She had burst out with laughter one of the first times she had met him at the coffee shop; Sidney had said ‘Tom’ to the blushing young girl behind the counter. “Why Tom?” had she asked. “Sometimes I just need not to be Sidney Parker, the actor”, he had replied. “Oh, does that work?”, had she continued with mischief and laughter in her eyes. Before he could answer, the young girl had called out “Sidney Parker” with blushing cheeks and a gazing look. Charlotte laughed heartedly and he couldn’t help but laugh with her. It was a rainy day with steel grey clouds but the rain had stopped and the sun peeped palely through the clouds. “I am going for a walk, would you like to join me, “Tom”?”, Charlotte asked with a big smile. They walked next to each other for a while without talking, the wind played with her curls and Sidney thought she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. “I spent most of my time outside back home. Helping out or hiking. I love the fresh air and the infinite space of nature; it has taken me some time to adjust to life in New York.” Sidney looked at her, “Have you? Have you adjusted?” “I’m getting there. I do miss the countryside. But New York has its charms. I can see why Godmother D moved here.” 

One Saturday morning Sidney knocked on her door with breakfast and an array of beverages, “I didn’t know what you prefer in the morning”, he said shyly. Charlotte looked wonderful. His eyes lingered on the curves of her legs in a pair of rugged denim shorts and the grey silk shirt was thin enough to show the contours of her waist and breasts in the backlight and she was barefooted – as she often was at home. He had noticed. “Thank you, Sidney. Would you like to come in? My books have finally arrived and I’m just…” Charlotte pointed towards the big build in bookshelf with a ladder. She wondered what he was up to so early on a Saturday morning in a tailored 3-piece suit. Very tailored indeed. “I have a lunch meeting later”, he replied as if he guessed her question, “but do you need a hand until then?” Charlotte nodded. He felt very close and she could feel the heat radiating from him. They worked silently, Charlotte on the ladder and Sidney handing her the books. He couldn’t resist standing close to her legs and watch the sun kissed skin in her popliteal and take in the scent of her, it was intoxicating and very sexy. He felt hot and dizzy and accidently brushed her leg with his lips as he handed her some more books. Not too steady herself, Charlotte lost her balance and fell into his arms. Their eyes locked but he could feel her breast heaving up and down and he held on tighter to her decreasing the distance between them. He moved his eyes down to her lips. She bit in her bottom lip and when his eyes wandered further down, he could see her nipples go hard and pointy. “Hungry?”, she asked in a husky voice, desperately trying to gain control again. It didn’t work. “Starving…”, he replied, his voice dark and hungry, and fixed his eyes on her lips again. “Well, you better put me down then”. She took a few steps away from him in the hope that her blushing cheeks would cool down and her breathing stop betraying her. Sidney looked at his phone with his back to her and hoped to God that she hadn’t noticed the hard bump in his pants. “Oh...”, he lied, “my lunch appointment is cancelled. I can stay if you like?” He held his breath as he waited for her reply. “Oh… that would be nice. Thank you...” Charlotte had forgotten all about his plans. 

All of her books were organized like small soldiers of knowledge on the bookshelf and they stood and admired their work. “Thank you, it would have taken forever without you” Sidney felt very proud of himself and send her a flashing bright smile. “What is that?”, he asked and pointed at a big safe in the corner. It had been hidden behind boxes of books. “Is it where you keep your jewelry?” “Hardly”, she answered, “It’s my favorite rifle”. Sidney looked surprised. “I hunt! I grew up in the countryside, it was a natural part of my upbringing”, she explained. “You never seize to amaze me, Miss Heywood – for security as well?” She laughed, “No, I would never… this would be faster!” and she floored him. Sidney felt an excruciating pain in his thumb and an excruciating desire in his loins as she sat on top of him with her knee on his chest and a firm grip of his hand. If she hadn’t laughed so hard and broken the tension, he would have kissed her. 

After some takeaway Sidney told her about his visits in old Lady Denham’s apartment. Charlotte laughed at his anecdotes and could only confirm that she was an extraordinary woman. Stubborn, grumpy, opinionated and came on a bit harsh to those who didn’t know her, not to mention bossy. “She insisted that I had a key so that she could summon me”, laughed Sidney. “You have a key to my door?”, Charlotte asked surprised. “I’m so sorry, I really didn’t think about it until right now. I’ll go get it for you”, he said embarrassed. “Oh no, it makes sense. Keep it, it’s nice to know, that I could get help if I should fall in the shower or lock myself out”, Charlotte replied thoughtfully (the building had a manned reception but who cared). “You know what? Lady Denham never saw it as a favor that should go both ways, why don’t I give you a key in return. That way, we are even”. Charlotte nodded, and he sprang back to his apartment and brought back a key. He looked at her, “We should set up some ground rules. If we don’t want to be disturbed, we use the door chain. And we should knock first”. Charlotte nodded again, that made sense. None of them wanted to express that their agreement didn’t rule out letting themselves in. 

“It looks very different now, the place”, Sidney said caught in his own thoughts. “Would you like a tour and see what I have done with the place?”, Charlotte offered and stood up. And so, she showed him her studio, a big bright room with a few chairs and various backdrops and of course a lot of photo equipment. Next stop was the dark chamber – “I can’t show you my study right now. I do portraits and I don’t feel it would be appropriate to show them to you”, she explained and looked at him with her big beautiful eyes. 

“It was Godmother D, that got me into photography”, she continued as if he had asked her. “Come here, I want to show you something”. She took his hand and dragged him into her bedroom. If she hadn’t looked so eager and innocent, he would have assumed that she was flirting, but of course she wasn’t and that made her even more attractive to him. “Look!”, she said and pointed at two large framed black and white photos, one showing a young girl with wild curls dotted with small forget-me-not-flowers, a mischievous smile and big sparkling, intelligent, observing and curious eyes. He felt as if he was staring into a galaxy. His heart skipped a beat of gratitude that she trusted him enough to share this with him. Charlotte’s soft voice brought him back. 

“She gave me my first camera when I turned 10. These are the very first two photos taken with it. One of me by her, and one of her by me. I know she wasn’t an easy person to be around. But I loved her. She treated me like a person and really saw me. I sometimes felt she knew me better than anyone. These two portraits are the reason why I chose portraits for a living. I like to show people as they are and how they want to be seen. That is why I spend so much time with them when I do the shooting and I spend time with the portraits afterwards to choose the right ones” 

She paused, “I’m sorry, I’m babbling…” Sidney looked at her and fell even more in love with her. Charlotte could feel his eyes on her even with her back to him as she tried to compose herself. “She was very fond of you, you know”, she said after a pause. “Fond even?”, Sidney smiled. “She must have been, she talked a lot about you, and you know she wouldn’t have, if you hadn’t made a remotely good impression on her”, Charlotte continued with smile and laughter in her voice. Sidney nodded, that sounded true. “In fact, she was very annoyed that you were always away the times I was here. She very much wanted to introduce us, and I think that she would be very pleased to see us right now as friendly neighbors”. Charlotte smiled nervously at him. Sidney felt a small sting by her last words but also a great warmth and pride to be someone, that the old Lady would like to introduce to her favorite person in the world. He had never felt more special.


	3. Feel her breath on my face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sidney gives in and invites Charlotte over. Drinks and dancing with his friends and family.  
> They dance for the first time, before he has to go away for a month. Love and desire is in the air.

During the next weeks Sidney and Charlotte spend more and more time together. He would come by in the morning with breakfast and lock himself in. She never used her key to his place but seemed perfectly fine that he dropped in at odd hours. Sometimes he could hear she was working in the studio and would tiptoe out again. He just felt at home where she was. 

“Heywood, do you have any plans this Friday?” Charlotte looked up from her book. They would often sit like this. Reading – often with him watching her amazed with her hunger for Greek philosophers, biographies and other solid food for mind. Or play chess where she usually won. “No, why?”. This was not normal. They never made plans, he just popped up or popped in. “My closest friends and family are coming over for drinks. I want them to meet you, they don’t believe that someone as amazing as you would hang out with an arrogant brute like me”, he laughed. “And I’ll be away for the next month on set in New Zealand and want to spend as much time with you as I can”. “I would love to”, she answered softly and returned slightly flustered to her book. 

When Friday came, Charlotte was nervous. Strangely nervous and very conscious about picking the right outfit. She smoothed the soft woolen fabric of her skirt before she opened her door to cross the hallway. Quite contempt in a white cashmere sweater, white pencil skirt and grey knee-high suede boots. Sidney opened the door before she could knock and gave her big warm hug that no one in the room missed lasted a great deal longer than a friendly hug normally did. “You look beautiful”, he whispered with his mouth close to her ear. She could feel his warm breath on her earlobe and his warm hands on her lower back. “Thank you, you too”, she whispered back with her breath hitting his neck like a swirl of a hot tongue. He did look dashing in black pants, black suede shoes and a grey shirt. Sidney forced himself to let her go from his hug but kept his hand on her lower back. It felt both protective and hot. 

“This is Charlotte, my favorite neighbor”, Sidney introduced her with a proud and tender smile. “And this is my older brother Tom and his wife, Mary – they have the 4 funniest kids. You will like them. Next is Georgiana, married to my other brother, Arthur, and Arthur of course, and over there next to the rugged gentleman is my little sister, Diana. I must warn you about Crowe, one of my oldest friend – and an absolute scoundrel but solid as gold if he likes you…” Crowe interrupted with a great cheer, slightly drunk but with humor and kindness in his eyes, “Very nice to meet you, Charlotte. If Sidney had told me how lovely you are, I would have song serenades to you”. Sidney laughed, “Thank you, Crowe. Stand down, Boy” – he sent his friend a don’t-you-dare-look. “Last but not least the lovely Esther and Babington… Babington, Crowe and I have been friends since we were children”. Not once did Sidney take his hand of Charlotte’s back, when Crowe made his not so subtle move, he even grasped her a little bit and pulled her closer. 

It was a wonderful evening. Charlotte enjoyed their company and cried with laughter as Babington and especially Crowe shared the most embarrassing moments from Sidney’s youth. At some point Crowe sat by Sidney’s piano and yelled, “dance, children, and I shall play”. Had it been a playlist it would have been an odd mix but somehow it was the perfect soundtrack for the evening. Sidney had to resist himself from monopolizing Charlotte on the dancefloor. And he had to admit it did have its advantages to be able to watch her move from a distance. Her eyes were shining, her curls tied up in a messy ponytail danced and he could feel her laughter like summer rain on his skin. None of his friends or family had any doubt that their Sidney was very much in love and doing a crappy job at hiding it. The stolen glances from Charlotte indicated that the feelings might be returned. Crowe, who wasn’t so drunk that he couldn’t help a mate out, shifted to a slow song when Sidney after too much time finally had Charlotte in his arms again. Crowe had a beautiful and husky singing voice: 

She's like the wind through my tree  
She rides the night next to me  
She leads me through moonlight  
Only to burn me with the sun  
She's taken my heart  
But she doesn't know what she's done 

Feel her breath on my face  
Her body close to me  
Can't look in her eyes  
She's out of my league  
Just a fool to believe  
I have anything she needs  
She's like the wind 

I look in the mirror and all I see  
Is a young old man with only a dream  
Am I just fooling myself  
That she'll stop the pain  
Living without her  
I'd go insane 

Feel her breath on my face  
Her body close to me  
Can't look in her eyes  
She's out of my league  
Just a fool to believe  
I have anything she needs  
She's like the wind 

Feel your breath in my face  
Your body close to me  
Can't look in your eyes  
You're out of my league  
Just a fool to believe 

The world disappeared. Charlotte could feel Sidney in her entire body and couldn’t tell anymore where they parted as two people. His lips hovered close to her ear, cheek and sometimes brushed her forehead. His hand on her back felt like a burning sensation and her skin prickled from his touch. His breath caressed her as he tried to absorb as much of her scent and being as he could without removing her clothes and make love to her on the floor. Sidney was in a haze of happiness. She had her head rested against his shoulder and her nose and mouth tugged in against his neck. He could feel her lips on his skin, and it send jolts down his spine and he prayed to any God that would listen that he could keep his cock from saluting this divine creature in his arms. They didn’t notice when Crowe finished the song – and he did try to wake them up with a finishing – and loud – stroke across the keys. Instead he got up and knocked his amorous friend on the back and announced his goodbyes. Reluctantly Sidney let go of Charlotte who with blushing cheeks laughing gave Crowe a warm hug and thanked for a wonderful entertainment followed by a kiss on the cheek. Crowed responded with a wet kiss on her mouth and left waving his arm. Sidney felt a pang of jealousy – he hadn’t kissed Charlotte yet. The rest hugged and said goodbye. Mary whispered in his ear, “She is lovely, and you are in love, dear boy. Best of luck”. 

Charlotte had moved out into the hallway with them and for the life of him he couldn’t come up with an excuse to get her back inside. Instead he offered her his arm, “May I escort you to your home, Miss Heywood?” “You may, Sir”, she answered and took his arm. The few steps to her door were done too quickly. “May I write to you while I am away, Charlotte?” “Of course, I do hope that we will be able to stay in touch. A month is a long time and I have gotten used to having you around”. He gave her a soft goodnight kiss on the cheek, squeezed her hands and went back inside cursing that he couldn’t control himself around her. The thoughts that went through his mind every time he touched her – she didn’t deserve them. 

The month felt long for both. Especially Sidney who felt homesick for the first time but tried to act on set in a manner that he thought would make her proud. Charlotte passed the days with clients, walks with Esther. Who despite her general dislike to other people enjoyed the company of her new friend. Esther texted Sidney with a selfie of the two, “Don’t mess this up. I’m keeping this one!” Another friend kept Charlotte from feeling too lonely, namely Susan Worcester. They met at a boring party in London a few years back where they both had drawn back to the same empty room to get away from people. Susan was a famous jetsetter and designer and had taken instant like to Charlotte. Susan had in no time introduced the young promising photographer to her friends and like she said, “social circle is like the cog of a clock, get one and the rest will follow”. She was right – as she always was - but also knew that well-connected or not, at the end of the day, it was Charlotte’s honest and sweet talent that kept them coming back for more. 

“What is on your mind, my dear Charlotte?”, Susan asked one evening they were dining somewhere. “Oh, I am so sorry to be such bad company”, Charlotte started. “Nonsense, you are excellent company. But you are also in love, I dare say. I am never wrong, when it comes to matters of the heart, you know!”, Susan laughed and took Charlotte’s hand. “Tell me all about him”. Charlotte’s heart burst out through her mouth and she told Susan everything about Sidney Parker. From the first meeting to his hands and lips on the last meeting. When Charlotte finally finished, she said quietly, “I think I love him, and I don’t know what to do. He is famous actor who could have anybody and I am just me.” 

Sidney and Charlotte facetimed almost every day. He didn’t always have the time difference in order, but she didn’t care. They sent each other music numbers, selfies and Charlotte played for Sidney on her cello. But the highlights were the letters. Charlotte gasped when she received the first handwritten letter from Sidney. On thick beautiful paper with a surprisingly elegant handwriting. It was a perfect letter. With humor, anecdotes, affection and all the subtle love he dared to express. She responded in the same style. The handwritten letters were tactile and holding something that he had touched and that smelled faintly of him made the distance between them a bit shorter for a moment. She loved him for it. Sidney read all of her letters as the last thing he did in the evening and recalled her scent and sparkling being. 

Finally, one day Charlotte got out of the elevator, Sidney was there. Leaning up against her doorframe, waiting. He grasped her and lifted her up, “you have no idea how much I’ve missed you!” He held her close and kissed her on the cheek, trying to hold himself back and not strip her naked and take her up against the wall. She wanted to jump him but smiled to him and focused on not crying. They talked all night about time that had gone by and were very careful not to let the other one know how much their heart was aching from love and absence.


	4. Her body close to me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte get's a bit drunk and tries to seduce Sidney. Will he be able to act like a gentleman?

“Come with me to Thanksgiving! The whole gang will be there, and Tom and Mary would love to have you as well… erm, I would too of course…”, Sidney looked at her with a soft smile. Charlotte nodded with a smile back over her cup of hot tea and they continued with the breakfast he had brought. 

Thanksgiving came and Sidney gallantly took the overnight bag out of her hand and offered her his arm with a big boyish smile. His car was parked and ready down on the street. Charlotte burst out laughing at the sight of the car, a Volvo of older date. “Is that your car? I expected the Batmobile or something like that fitting an action movie actor”. Sidney looked at her, “are you disappointed? I don’t drive much, you see...”  
“No! No! Just surprised. I much prefer this kind of car ride”, Charlotte replied and got in the car. He smiled relieved to himself. She looked wonderful in leather leggings, a big cashmere sweater with a high roll neck framing her glowing face with softness, sneakers and a camel colored coat. 

Apart from the elevator this was the smallest space they had shared, and it felt very intimate, thrilling and awkward at the same time. Charlotte turned on the radio and they drove for a while without talking. “Tell me about your family”, Charlotte asked. And Sidney told her about his upbringing, how the brothers first got closer when their parents passed away only a year apart, and how he alienated him from them when his girlfriend back then dumped him on set for the director. How he had spent his time drinking and fighting in underground clubs instead of dealing with what had happened. On the same time his career propelled to fame and stardom. It was hard. Sidney paused his narrative for a while, “Tom game to my apartment one evening and told me to get a grip, clean up and be the man, that our parents had raised me to be. He and Mary took me in. I stayed at their house for 3 months and I owe it to them and their children that I got my life back on track. You can’t really be a drunk asshole when 4 children climb up your lap and insist you read a story and do all the voices”. Sidney looked at her and asked her the same question for the second time that day, “Are you disappointed?”. She stroked his arm and looked him softly in the eyes, “No, proud to know you. Thank you for sharing this with me. I can’t wait to hear you read a story and do all the voices though”. They laughed and the rest of the drive felt like normal between them. Almost. 

Sidney and Charlotte were greeted by four very excited children. The youngest, Henry - a beautiful 5-year-old boy, shouted at the top of his lungs, “UNCLE SIDNEY, UNCLE SIDNEY, UNCLE SIDNEY…” Sidney picked him up on his left arm and did a secret handshake with his right. Charlotte melted. 

Brunch was served and afterwards most went outside in the big garden. Mary, Georgiana and Diana insisted that they didn’t need any help in the kitchen. The children clung to Charlotte and showed her all their favorite spots. She in return showed them how to use her cameras. Sidney watched her instruct them how to catch the perfect moment and motif kneeling beside them and seeing the world from their perspective; pointing, listening and explaining with her care and respect turned towards them and not her own expensive equipment. He had never seen all four of them so concentrated for such a long period of time. She was wonderful and he fantasized how it would be to raise a family of their own, if only… Mary interrupted his train of thoughts and announced snacks were ready. 

It was a family tradition to play football in the afternoon before the sun set completely. Sidney and Charlotte were on opposite teams. Charlotte’s new fan, Henry, explained her the rules. She put her curls up in a ponytail. The game began and Sidney was passed the ball and started running towards Charlotte expecting her to get out the way. He was after all significantly taller, broader and stronger than her, but she didn’t. Before he knew what happened he was lying on the grass held down by a soft warm body, panting breath and brown eyes sparkling with triumph and joy. He reminisced the evening where she had demonstrated her skills and floored him. Henry picked up the ball and Crowe threw him over his shoulder and ran gaining points for Team Charlotte. The game continued mostly as battle between Sidney and Charlotte who seemed to target each other out. Henry passed the ball to Charlotte and Crowe blocked Tom while she ran for the goal line avoiding Sidney’s attempt to tackle her. He took up pursuit amazed how fast she could run but eventually caught up with her and grasped her around the waist and threw her over his shoulder and had a tight grip on her behind. He could feel the roundness and curves of her strong thighs and the perfectly shaped butt. Charlotte ignored how good it felt to have his hands there, feel the warmth and how it would be if he moved his hand between her thighs and… “Henry, catch!”, she yelled and gave Henry the ball hanging from Sidney’s shoulder. “Run, Henry, RUN!”. And Henry ran and made a touchdown. Sidney put Charlotte down without letting go of her. “You should have kept your hands on the prize”, she whispered. He lifted her chin with his hand, slightly stroking her chin with his thumb, his eyes were dark and piercing when he whispered back, “What makes you think, I didn’t?”. They were interrupted by a very pleased and triumphant Henry. 

Thanksgiving dinner was lovely. Chatter and laughter filled the cozy dining room. After the children had been tucked into their beds all the grownups sat in the living room and talked and drank wine. It was well after midnight when Sidney said goodnight to Charlotte and gave her soft kiss on the cheek, she was charmingly drunk and smiled sweetly as she kissed him goodnight back on the mouth. Just a soft peck but Sidney felt it in every fiber of his body and hastily went into the safety of his room. Their rooms were next to each other and they could hear each other get ready for bed and settle in. Sidney couldn’t sleep. She was too close. Charlotte dozed off but woke up with Sidney’s handsome face close to hers. She moved closer and reached out only to fall off the bed and hit her head on the night table. She had fantasized about him in her sleep. Slightly embarrassed over herself she crept out of the room to go and get a glass of cold water in the kitchen and an icepack for the aching bump on her head. Sidney heard the bump as she fell and the door opening. He hoped for a short while that she might come into his room. When she didn’t, he went downstairs looking for her. He found her in the kitchen holding an icepack to her temple. The moon shined through the window and backlit her body. She wore a thin electric blue silk short-legged and short-armed pajama. “Are you alright?”, he asked. “Yes, yes, just tumbled out of bed”, she mumbled embarrassed, “I’m not used to drinking so much wine”.  
“Let me see, I am a doctor after all”, he lifted her up on the kitchen counter and she spread her legs enough for him to step in close and examine her bruised head. He cupped her head with his hands and stroked her forehead with his thumbs. “Charlotte, please follow my finger”, he lowered his head so he could watch her eyes follow his finger. Charlotte didn’t listen. She was focusing on his naked chiseled torso, the moonlight on his skin, his warmth, his groin, his mouth, his… everything… “You’ll be fine. Do you want me to carry yo…“ Sidney didn’t get to finish his sentence. Charlotte wrapped her legs around his waist and pressed him against her sensitive and wanting area, breathing heavily she put her arms around his neck and pulled his head down and kissed him. Hesitant at first but then she got bolder and licked and bit his lower lip. Sidney cupped her face and kissed her back. He dove his fingers into her curls trying to remove any distance between them. He could feel her pushing herself against him, he was rock hard. Her fingers moved down to the edge of his pajamas pants and crawled further down and stroked the top of his well-trained ass. His hands started wandering as well, sliding under her top and moving up to cup her breasts and gently pinch her hard nipples. She groaned and her tongue danced even more in his mouth. Craving him. When he felt her hand move down his pants to take him in hand, he pulled back. It took all he had. “Please, Charlotte…” he panted with his forehead against hers, catching his breath for a few seconds, “Not like this, not when you are drunk. I love you too much to take you like this. And believe me I want to. But please let me do the right thing.” She didn’t respond. Her body felt numb and he lifted her head to look her in the eyes. He wanted to show her that he meant it. Ensure her that he had never loved anyone as he loved her or desired anyone as much as he desired her. Charlotte was fast asleep, and he pulled her in to his embrace still standing between her legs. He rocked her gently like a baby stroking her back, he was both relieved and disappointed that she seemingly hadn’t heard all of it. When he had steadied himself, he picked her up, carried her up the stairs and tucked her in her bed. Happy, confused and horny he climbed into his own bed. He could still feel her fingers exploring his body and her tongue in his mouth and stroked his aching and flaming member until he came.


	5. Just a fool to believe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte and Sidney spends Christmas Eve together but not New Year's.

The next morning Sidney observed Charlotte carefully during breakfast. Did she remember what had happened last night? Had she heard what he said to her? Charlotte felt his eyes on her and couldn’t quite determine if it was a good or a bad thing. She remembered kissing him and the sensation of his hands and lips on her body, but she was not quite sure if it really happened or she just dreamed it. Everybody else sensed a change in the two even Henry who gave up trying to get his uncle’s attention. 

After hugging everyone goodbye Sidney and Charlotte drove back in silence to Sanditon Terrace. When they parted in the hallway, Charlotte called out to him: 

“Sidney?” 

“Yes…” 

“Last night… did we…?” 

“No”, Sidney smiled reassuring at her and closed his door behind him. He hoped she didn’t notice his blushing cheeks as her question recalled how it felt to explore her body and how electrifying her fingers had been on his skin. 

A few nights later Charlotte was awakened by Sidney knocking desperately on her door. She gasped as she saw his bruised face and body. “I need your help…, I can’t see well enough to…“ He pointed helplessly at his broken eyebrow. “What has happened to you? Did someone rob you?” Sidney shook his head. “Fight club”, he explained embarrassed. He didn’t explain to her, that fighting was the only way he could think of to keep his mind of her and control the fire in his body he had felt since that night. Charlotte brought him into her kitchen and placed him on a chair. She cleaned the blood off him as carefully as she could and fixed an icepack on his bruises on his lower back with some bandages. She was resolute and confident in her treatment and he had the feeling that she might have done this before. “When you grow up in the countryside you know your way around first aid”, she mumbled as if she had read his mind. “Please spread a little…” she pointed at his legs, “I need to look at your eyebrow”. Sidney felt an instant suction in his stomach and hoped that she wouldn’t get too close. Charlotte cleaned the wound. Her curls caressed his naked shoulders and he could smell her. “I am a doctor, you know...”, he started not quite sure why he said it. “Well then, as a doctor you should tell yourself not to fight. Why on earth did you go?” She was patching up his eyebrow with butterflies. Luckily, she didn’t wait for him to answer. “I think this is the best I can do, but you should go see a doctor in the morning. A proper on, not yourself”, she smiled at him. “Do you want to stay? On the sofa, I mean… I am a little bit concerned about the beatings you have taken to your head”. He nodded and send her a pale smile. To his surprise she didn’t leave him but placed herself at the other end with a blanket and a book. Sidney felt almost happy just sitting there with her like this. 

December came and Sidney and Charlotte were almost back to normal. Sidney bumped in as usual with breakfast after his morning training regime. They would talk like good friends for a little while before she had to continue her work. And so, the days went by without any of them stirring up any new emotions. 

As Christmas eve was getting closer, Charlotte got more and more excited about going home to her family for the holidays. Sidney knew how much she missed them but also dreaded being without her for two full weeks. He had asked Tom and Mary if he could stay with them and the children until after New Year’s and they had welcomed him although quite surprised that he didn’t have a bunch of parties to attend. On the morning of her departure Charlotte gave him a bag of Christmas presents for everyone. All beautifully wrapped with a loving and personal greeting cards attached, “Would you please give these to everyone? There are presents for Crowe and The Babingtons as well if you see them”. He nodded, “I have one for you as well, but would you mind if I give it to you when you get back? I would like to see your face, when you...”, he blushed and smiled. She nodded and smiled. And after a slightly awkward hug she was off to the airport. 

Hours later Charlotte knocked on his door again. Sidney embraced her without thinking and only noticed the tears in her eyes after he let go again. “My flight was cancelled and because of the holiday rush there are no other flights… I had so longed to… How am I going to…” His heart melted. He lifted her chin and looked her in the eyes, “You are coming with me. Mary and Tom would love to have you for Christmas. Not to mention the kids”. He kissed her softly on the forehead and held her close. “Thank you”, she mumbled against his chest. It felt safe and warm and like home to stand there with his arms around her and she loved him so dearly and deeply it hurt. 

On Christmas Eve day they packed the Volvo with presents and their small overnight bags. Sidney was right, everyone there was more than happy to have Charlotte for Christmas. Henry didn’t let go of her hand and dragged her around and let her in on all the traditions. Charlotte laughed and her whole being sparkled with joy. Dinner was lovely and afterwards they sat in the cozy living room with candy and sang carols and talked. Henry convinced Charlotte that they should stay up or at least sleep in the living room and keep an eye out for Santa. Charlotte suggested they set up her digital camera with motion sensor. Henry thought that was a rather clever idea even though he would never fall asleep. Sidney couldn’t help himself and got Henry to include him on the watch as well. As the house went quiet the three of them sat in their pajamas and blankets in the big sofa. Henry was tired but persistent but finally his eyes closed shut ever so slowly. Charlotte lay him down and tucked the blanket around him and stroked his cheeks fondly. “Will you help me?”, she asked and looked at Sidney with excitement in her eyes. And the two of them worked for the next couple of hours making a video of Santa rushing by, eating the cookies, drinking the milk and leaving little treats and surprises. Sidney watched her as she edited the film and content showed him the result. All you could see was a red flash, cookies disappearing along with the milk. And the treats popping out of thin air. Exhausted they fell asleep next to Henry. Charlotte resting her head in Sidney’s lap. 

Next morning, they woke up as the rest of the family came downstairs to open presents. Charlotte and Henry checked if Santa had been around, Henry jumped with excitement when he saw that the camera had been activated. Charlotte sent the video up on the big TV screen and even the eldest Parker child was quite convinced that Santa had stopped by. Charlotte’s whole being sparkled with joy, thrilled that her plan had worked. Sidney could hardly breathe; she was amazing in every way. 

Everybody got an individual and beautiful photo album from Charlotte with stunning black and white photos of them. Tom and Mary’s also had photos in it taken by the children. Every photo was accompanied by a quote or small text in Charlotte’s beautiful handwriting. Tom and Mary laughed at a photo taken by Henry. All you could see was legs. The text said, “Look again”. And they looked again and behind the legs Henry’s true motif appeared, the family dog in a staring contest with a squirrel. Sidney recalled how Charlotte respectfully had shown his nephews how to compose an interesting photo. His heart beat a little faster when he opened his album. Him with Henry on his shoulders exploring something in a tree. Him surrounded by his laughing nephews as he read a story with all the voices. Him reading on her sofa. A few selfies of the two of them. Laughing. All photos where he felt proud to be seen like that by her. Or he hoped to God that the photos were how she saw him. He was quite surprised himself. There were quite a few taken by his nephews, especially one made him gasp with delight, Jenny had caught the very moment when Sidney had lifted Charlotte’s chin at the ballgame and whispered, she was the price. The photo revealed how close they had stood; how close his lips had been to touch hers. Her hands leaning on his sides as he had let her slid down his body from his shoulder. The caption simply said, “Touch Down”. He didn’t quite know what to make of it, but his heart beated faster and he trembled a bit. Could she be in love with him too? The last photo was of him gazing out over the sea caught in his own thoughts. The caption said, “No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man.”. 

Diana blushed. Charlotte knew why and winked softly at her. The last photo in Diana’s album was her and Crowe looking tenderly at each other in safe distance from the rest of the group on the photo. The text only said, “…?” 

“You did good. Thank you”, Sidney whispered in Charlotte’s ear as he gave her his present. She gasped as she opened the box, inside was a beautiful bracelet in gold with Greek philosophers as charms but constructed in a way where they wouldn’t disturb her work or feel bulky on her arm. Sidney had noticed she rarely wore any jewelry. On the backside there was engraved a carefully chosen quote from each philosopher. “How did you…? It’s lovely”, Charlotte said quietly. Sidney gently put the bracelet on her wrist and held on to her hand. “I had it made. Your friend Susan knew a gold smith that you would approve of”. “Thank you, I will never take it off again”. “I have another present for you, Charlotte”. “More? But…” “Just open it”. Charlotte opened and inside was a small toy airplane, she looked puzzled at Sidney. He smiled at her, “I asked around. My friend, James Stringer, is going to London tonight in his private jet and he would love to give you a lift”. Sidney had hardly finished the sentence before Charlotte flung her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you, thank you, thank you… you have no idea what that means to me”. “I’m glad. Well, we better get back then and get you packed. I’ll drive you there”. Mary noticed the mixed emotions in Sidney’s face, how proud he was to be hero of the day, love and affection for Charlotte and the shadow of sadness that it also meant she would be leaving. 

James Stringer was good-looking man with a bright smile and a charming wit that you could tell from miles apart. Sidney regretted this already, suddenly feeling that Charlotte might fall in love in the intimacy of the long night flight. He had taken her hand to help her out of the car and had not let go yet, and she had let him hold it like it was the most natural thing to do. “How kind of you to keep me company on the flight, Miss Heywood”, James smiled and bowed before her. Charlotte laughed and replied in a more grateful and serious tone, “Well, Mr. Stringer, thank you for doing this. I cannot tell you how much it means to me”. She turned to Sidney and said fondly, “And thank you for making this happen. It is truly the best gift ever”. “Well then, we best be off. See you soon, Sidney”, James said and offered his arm to Charlotte. Sidney couldn’t resist himself and reached out for Charlotte and gave her a soft kiss on the mouth. “Say hi to your family for me and call me when you have landed” – “And you, Sir…” Sidney looked at James with all the amusement he could muster, “You behave…!” If Charlotte was surprised by his slightly possessive behavior, she didn’t show it. She kissed Sidney on the cheek and promised to call him, gave him a last hug and took James arm and got on the plane. Sidney felt oddly lost, as he watched them disappear. “You stupid idiot, what have you done?” 

After a restless night he received a text from Stringer “What a divine creature. Are you two serious or can a bloke invite her out to dinner?” Sidney stared at his phone like it had fangs and hissed at him. A pang of jealousy burned through his body. Quite frankly he had forgotten just how charming a man, James Stringer was. And how decent he was, as his text implied. After multiple attempts to come up with a proper answer Sidney finally texted back, “She is very dear to me and to be honest I would like us to be. That is all I can say.” His thumb sent the text before his mind could regret it. A few minutes later a text came back “I can’t blame you. I shall behave like a gentleman.” 

Charlotte called half an hour later exited to be on her way to see her family and surprise them. James had insisted on taking her all the way and had also invited her to his New Year’s party. Sidney leaned his forehead against the window in his room at Tom and Mary’s house, calming himself with the cool feeling of the glass. It was a lovely talk though and he did manage to make her laugh. While Charlotte enjoyed being home with her family, she also missed Sidney and wondered if they would have celebrated New Year’s Eve together. His goodbye kiss had puzzled her, and she spent too much time analyzing why. Sidney passed his time with his nephews. Especially Henry was a great comfort, the 5-year-old proved to be an excellent companion for long talks about how wonderful Charlotte was and how much she was missed. Henry also gave him an excuse to Facetime her more often, he felt. Mary smiled at the long conversations Sidney had with Charlotte – with or without the excuse of Henry. They could talk for hours sharing their day and discussing what they were to do together when they saw each other again. 

New Year’s Eve came, and Sidney called Charlotte 10 minutes to midnight in London. She had gone to James’ party and was a bit tipsy and happy to hear from him. “I just wanted to wish you a Happy New Year before…” Sidney paused. He wanted to say, “before someone is going to kiss you”. Charlotte turned Facetime on. She looked radiant in a simple silver dress and pearl earrings. She lifted her arm and shook the golden bracelet. “Look, the philosophers are here too. They think it is a bit overwhelming with all those people.” Sidney’s heart jumped with joy, at least she thought of him. Midnight was only seconds away. “Have you found someone to kiss when the bell rings?”, he asked as casually as he could. “Actually…” Charlotte hesitated, “I was hoping that you would stay on the phone with me”. She looked him straight in the eyes, her eyebrows slightly lifted as she waited for his response. “I would be honored to”, Sidney said with a lump in his throat. And so, the two of them blew a kiss to each other when the bell announced the beginning of a crisp and brand-new year. Hours later Charlotte called him back to wish him a Happy New Year as well. Her eye lashes were longer than ever, and she looked even softer and kissable because she was tired but happy to have returned the favor. Sidney of course had to share her with his family but on the other hand it allowed him to finish with, “WE LOVE YOU” and thankfully it was just the two of them again when she whispered back, “I love you too”. Now it was Sidney’s turn to overanalyze whether she had meant ‘you’ in single or plural. 

James had insisted on taking Charlotte on the flight back with him. He had kept his promise to Sidney and had been an absolute gentleman and even fenced a few interested men away at the party. But he also promised himself that he wouldn’t wait forever for Sidney to make his move.


	6. She leads me through moonlight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sidney almost tells Charlotte how he feels, but then Eliza turns up naked.

Sidney was pacing behind his front door. Charlotte should be here any minute now. He had offered to pick her up at the airstrip, but James had insisted on taking her all the way. Finally, he heard the sweet sound of the elevator stopping at their floor, he almost fell over his feet to open the door when he heard the joyful conversation of James and Charlotte as they stepped out of the elevator. They stood for a while chatting and then at long fucking last James said goodbye. Sidney could hear them hugging before the elevator hummed that the perpetrator was leaving again. He couldn’t quite decide what to do and ended up staring at the door like it would somehow revel a solution. And it did in a way because Charlotte knocked softly on the door. And then she was in his arms laughing and then she was out of his arms again. “I am starving. Would you like to join me for some delicious takeaway? Whatever diet you are on can decide where we order from”, she winked at him. He smiled at her, helplessly in love, “You are in luck. It’s cheat day”. After they had finished their meal on his living room floor, she couldn’t hide how tired she was. “You should think that you could rest on a private plane, but James talks a lot.” Sidney helped her up on her feet and stood with her hands in his. “You should sleep, and I will come by with breakfast tomorrow”. 

Days passed with work until one morning where Charlotte did something she had never done before. While Sidney used his key to her place often, usually in the morning when he brought them both breakfast after his training, Charlotte never locked herself into his apartment. But this morning she was excited and did. For no reason. She knocked first but when there was no reply, she locked herself in. She could hear he was home and called out his name. No answer. She moved towards the noise and just as she crossed the step to his bedroom he came out of the bathroom. Butt naked and with water drops running slowly down his ribbed torso seeking the line of hair leading down to a quite impressive specimen of the male genitals. Charlotte stopped, gasped and Sidney could swear, that she parted her lips slightly and licked them. She stared breathless for longer than was ladylike. Not at Sidney’s handsome face. Not at his well-trained torso although she did linger there for a while. But Sidney between his legs. It looked soft-skinned and very fuckable. Dressed in jeans and a white t-shirt she felt more naked than him. Her nipples reached out for him, deceiving her in cahoots with the wet sensation in her briefs. Sidney coughed and smiled shyly at her, “I am sorry to have made you embarrassed. I didn’t hear you coming” Charlotte snapped out of it, “Why should I be embarrassed? I am fully dressed!” That broke some of the tension. “When you are too, I have something to show you. Do you have time to come in?” 

He found her in the studio where she was unpacking a new camera and examining it with great care and joy. “Do you mind helping me break in this new camera?” He nodded, and she started to set up the lights and told him about this new wonder and why she had bought it even though it was quite expensive. He watched her work, happy and enthusiastic, the flashes were being tested. At last she was satisfied and continued to chat and instruct him while she walked around him shooting photos. Sometimes she would stand still and explore him like she was trying to unveil his deepest layers. He felt more naked than a few hours ago when she saw him come out of the shower. Not in an uncomfortable way. On the contrary he felt warm and safe, like she had unfolded his true self. “When can I see the result?”, he asked nervously. “I don’t know. It is a new camera. If I am not happy with the result, never” she answered honestly, and he believed her. 

A week later or so Sidney sat across Charlotte at the round dinner table in her cozy kitchen. They had eaten and talked for hours. “Would you do me a favor?”, he changed the subject abruptly. “Of course. If it is in my power”, she looked at him and waited for him to continue. “Next Friday I have to go to a gala. Sort of work thing. I’m not very fond of these things but it would help if you would be my plus one. I know it is with short notice but I wasn’t sure I was going myself”. He waited anxiously for her to reply. “A gala… I don’t own a dress for that. But if Susan can help me out, I would love to go with you.” 

It turned out that Susan was more than willing and prepared to help with a dress for the black-and-white-gala. “I have just the dress for you. And it will drive him crazy”. Charlotte looked rather shocked at her friend and laughed. Susan was after all the only one who knew how madly in love Charlotte was with her neighbor. After a rather secretive dress fitting with no mirrors Susan sent her off with the blunt instruction, “he has to help you get dressed”. 

Sidney only needed to tie his bow tie. There was an hour until the car arrived when he received a text from Charlotte, “I need your help to get dressed”. With his heart pounding he locked himself in to her apartment and yelled her name out loud to warn her he was there. “In the bedroom!” she called. Sidney gasped. She looked stunning in a black slim dress that revealed a white lining when she moved. It had a high collar and long sleeves with elegant long cuffs and the fabric fell heavily around her body and caressed her curves. Her hair was done in a soft ponytail fixed with small diamond hairpins. Some stray curls caressed her neck and framed her face. Her eyes sparkled. “I think I buttoned it wrong in the back, and I need you to tape it too my skin” She turned around and as sensually covered she was in the front as seductively nude was she in the back. 

Sidney cleared his throat and stepped closer. Her scent was enchanting. Her skin golden and smooth as it caught the lights in her bedroom. She had buttoned the five small buttons wrong and he had to stand very close to unbutton the neck collar. His hands stroked the skin on her neck as he fumbled with the buttons. His mouth was dry. Proud that he survived the task without carrying her to bed, she said shyly, “and now you have to tape it to my skin, so it stays in place. It is rather… open”. She handed him the double-sided tape. “Susan said along the sides and of course at the top of my… ehm… at the end of my back”. With her back still turned at him she lifted her hair and waited. Sidney felt dizzy but his hands were eager to touch her and by some wonder managed to peal the protection paper of the tape and lift the fabric a bit and fasten it to her skin. His fingers thanked every God available every time they touched her skin and he was very careful to smooth out the fabric gently stroking his finger down her sides. Charlotte tried very hard to stand still; his fingers sent lightning down her spine. Without knowing she kept her breath. Then Sidney came to fasten the dress just over her behind. His fingers followed the soft slope down her lower back and lifted the fabric, he could feel a stir in his pants and tried to think of anything that could take his mind of that Charlotte didn’t seem to be wearing any underwear. He worked slowly and carefully. “How does this dress work with underwear?”, he mumbled to himself. Charlotte looked at him over her shoulder, “It doesn’t” in a tone as if she had given him the weather report. That almost undid him. “SHOES!”, she yelled. “Would you take them for me. In the closet. It’s easy, they would be the only pair suited for a gala.” Sidney went to the closet, happy to have marching order to obey. She wasn’t lying. Sneakers, boots and flat shoes in numbers but only one pair of heels. He brought them out to her, but his trials were not over. “I think I should have put them on before the dress, would you mind helping me again and then I’m ready to go”. Sidney nodded and knelt before her, gently lifting one foot up on his knee and sliding the shoe on before closing the buckle. He held her ankle for a while enjoying her smooth leg under the dress. A leg that led to a thigh that led to a Charlotte without underwear. She removed her foot and placed the other foot on his knee. Sidney was desperate now, he could almost smell her private place and taste it. His hands closed the last buckle and were just about to wander helplessly up her leg, when his phone buzzed. The car was here. 

Outside Sidney helped her in the car and got in from the other side. She looked happy and expectant. The long slit in her dress revealed a perfectly shaped…and bare knee. His heart raced, he took her hand in his and looked softly at her, “Thank you for doing this”. It seemed to calm them both down a bit. Her hand stayed in his. 

When they arrived at the venue Charlotte squeezed Sidney’s hand. The place was crawling with press. She looked desperately at him. “You’ll be fine. I’ve got you”. With those words Sidney got out of the car, waved while he headed for her door and gallantly helped her out. Reporters started shouting, “WHO IS YOUR DATE?” “IS SHE YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND?”. Sidney held her hand tight and stroked it with his thumb, he sent a flashing smile at the crowd and calmly answered with laughter in his voice, “I wish… she is my neighbor and dearest friend. Without her I would be lost”. He looked fondly at her as he spoke the last part. That photo made the tabloid covers the next morning. They got inside safely, and he placed a soft kiss on her cheek, “are you alright?” She nodded. 

From one crowd to the next. It was quite overwhelming, and Charlotte didn’t let go of his hand. When they stopped to small talk Sidney put his hand protectively on her back and drew her close. The heat from their skin touching could have set the sprinklers off. Eventually Charlotte relaxed a little and started to enjoy herself, she met a handful of her clients and Sidney thought to himself, that of course this beauty by his side had gained the respect and trust of so picky and discretion demanding a clientele like the high society of New York. They came to her and greeted her warmly. Some with a peck on the cheek. Charlotte would introduce him, and he would listen proud when they praised her work. During one of these little talks a slender arm snug under his and he turned around and his heart stopped. He clutched Charlotte’s hand so hard that she felt something was very wrong. “Sidney, Darling. It has been ages. How have you been?” Sidney eyes flashed with anger at the sight of Eliza Campion, the woman who left him for the director years back. Somehow, they had managed not to cross paths during the years but here she was. He took a step back away from Eliza and towards to Charlotte. So close he nearly stepped on her toes. “Charlotte, this is Eliza Campion… Eliza, this is Charlotte Heywood…my…” “Partner in crime and everything else, nice to meet you”, Charlotte came to his rescue. Eliza looked intensely at Charlotte smelling blood, “are you an actress as well?” “Oh no, I am not in the industry”, Charlotte replied calmly hoping that Eliza would keep her as a target, she could feel Sidney’s discomfort through their hands and felt like shielding him. Eliza took the bait, “I didn’t think I recognized you but I am awfully bad with faces and you could have been an extra in one of my movies” and she continued to list which movies it could have been. Charlotte listened without giving away any emotions. When Eliza had finished her badly disguised bragging, Charlotte placed her knockout, “Oh, that explains why I didn’t know who you were. I haven’t seen or heard of any of those movies”. Eliza looked furious and at that moment, someone grabbed Charlotte from behind and joked “Heeeere’s Johnnyyyy”. Charlotte turned with a big smile on her face and hugged the intruder warmly, “Jack, how wonderful to see you!”. “Sidney, this is Jack… Jack, this is Sidney and another colleague of yours, Eliza.” The look on Eliza’s face was priceless and Sidney had never been more impressed with Charlotte. Before Eliza made her excuses to leave them, she put her mouth close to Sidney’s ear and whispered, “By the way, there has been a change of cast on your next movie. I can’t wait to spend two months in Italy with you, my darling.” 

Jack dragged Charlotte to the dancefloor with his characteristic grin, “that is quite some dress, Sweetheart” he said and placed his hand a little too low on her naked back. “Remember the rules, Jack”, Charlotte warned in a schoolteacher tone of voice and Jack’s hand immediately moved to take her arm. It was quite a sight to see them dance and Sidney had the perfect view to watch Charlotte’s body move in the dress, her skin shimmered in the lights and her face cracked with laughter over her dance partner’s most likely indecent conversation. “Hello, Sidney. Nice to see a familiar face here”, the dark voice belonged to Susan who probably had every person in the room on personal speed dial. He liked her and had ever since Charlotte had introduced them the first time. She had been very eager to help him with the bracelet and he generally had the feeling that she was above this world, omniscient and like a fairy godmother to those she loved. He also had the feeling that you would regret the day she decided against you. Susan followed his gaze, “What do you think of the dress?” Sidney recalled touching Charlotte’s skin and the glimpse he got of her well-shaped bum. His mouth was dry, and he cleared his throat. Susan laughed and gave his arm a squeeze, “Thank you, that was exactly the review I was aiming for”. Sidney smiled shyly back at her and they chatted for a short while until Jack escorted Charlotte back. 

“May I?” Sidney reached out his hand. “You may”, Charlotte took his hand and they went for the dancefloor. He put one hand on her back and pulled her in as she placed one hand on his shoulder and let him envelope the other. Time stood still and the room disappeared. At this very moment everything was right and perfect. He could feel her warm breath on his neck, and he let his lips browse her temple. His hand burned against her skin and he allowed himself to gently stroke her skin, just barely touching her. The sensation for both was electrifying. She let a finger slide up and play with his collar and trailing his skin. She buried her head in his neck and every time her lips caressed his skin it sent jolts of desire through his body. How long they were dancing or to how many numbers none of them knew, but they were pulled back to this world when the live band announced a short break. Sidney lifted her chin, looked tenderly in her eyes and placed a kiss on her cheek. “Thank you” “You’re welcome”, she mumbled lost in his wonderful gaze. 

“This finger food is hardly a meal”, Charlotte stated as she took a little something from a plate. Sidney looked amused at her; she was nothing like the women he normally met on set. Always worried about their diet and weight. Charlotte had a healthy appetite and was almost always in motion whether she was inside or outside. Except when she was caught up in a book. “Come on, let’s go find a proper meal for you”, Sidney laughed. “No, we can’t. It’s your work thing. I’ll just raid another platter discretely”. He took her hand and escorted her firmly towards the exit, “I’m hungry too”. They found a small diner and sat in privacy in a booth and shared some courses from the menu. “Tell me about Eliza, is she the one who left you? You never told me her name”, Charlotte looked at him with her big eyes. He nodded. “I wonder if she was such a bitch even back then and how I allowed myself fall apart over a woman like her. She left me because I didn’t match her fame and now, she has weaseled her into my next movie because her fame has faded recently. She is going to Italy with me in March… I didn’t even know… until tonight”. Charlotte didn’t quite know how to feel about that information. Somehow, they escaped the topic of Eliza and talked and laughed as usual with the little difference that their eyes lingered more, and their intimacy and confidentiality had grown. 

Back in the hallway Sidney took both her hands and stepped close to her. His heart was beating so much that he feared it might burst out of his chest entirely, “Charlotte… Sweet, bright and darling Charlotte. I believe I am my best self, my truest self, when I’m with you.” Her eyes sparkled even more as they welled up a bit, he cupped her lovely face and lowered his head slowly and found her lips. He kissed her softly at first, stroking her cheekbones tenderly with his thumbs. She responded to his kiss and parted her lips ever so slightly and he caressed her lower lip with his tongue. It was a slow kiss. Passionate and intense. She pulled him closer while their lips kept slow dancing until Sidney carefully closed the kiss and pulled slowly away still cupping her face. “I want to continue this conversation tomorrow; I have something I need to tell you… I want to do this right”, he placed a last lingering kiss on her cheek and followed her to her door and waited until she was inside before entering his own apartment. Truth was he had planned to tell her how much he loved her. But the night – even Eliza and Charlotte’s handling of her – had been so perfect, and he lost his courage afraid to jinx this blissful memory if she turned him down. He felt that something had grown between them, but he didn’t trust the judgement of his own overwhelming feelings. 

Lying in bed Charlotte’s heart had kept beating. The kiss had been just perfect, but she wanted more. Expected more. She was still hot and wet between her thighs and there was no way she could fall asleep after such a cliffhanger. Her body recollected every touch of his hands, his lips and his breath. His arousal had been palpable when he helped her fasten her dress, and when they had danced ever so closely and when he had kissed her. She had pushed herself subtly against him and imagined what it would be like to make love to him. Visions of Sidney naked was like putting out fire with gasoline. In love and longing Charlotte decided after an hour or so that she could not wait until morning to finish whatever conversation he was planning. She wanted him, even if it was only to be for one night. With a racing heart, a panting breath and his key in her hand she closed the door behind her to go over and tell Sidney that she loved him. Not sure if it would before or after she jumped him. 

Sidney’s door opened and her heart skipped a beat only to freeze when it was Eliza that appeared and not Sidney. “Still up, Charlotte?”, Eliza said triumphantly, “you might find him a bit exhausted; he is still the best fuck I have ever had”. Eliza adjusted her trench coat revealing that she was naked underneath. She strode into the elevator and the doors closed on her vicious smile. Charlotte could not move. Her whole world crumbled, and she was completely paralyzed. Tears streamed from her eyes when Sidney appeared in the doorway in nothing but his pants. He looked angry, confused and overly surprised, “Charlotte!!?... I…” “Is that what I am to you? Some kind of amusement? What do you want from me?”, Charlotte was trying to catch her breath, every fiber in her hurt so badly. “Charlotte, she had a key…” Sidney took a step forward and reached out for her. “Please, just leave me alone”, she cried, turned around and slammed her door behind her. Sidney fell to the floor and broke down. 

He must have gone inside at some point and fallen asleep on his living room floor. His chest felt empty and he tried to figure out what exactly had happened in hallway between Eliza and Charlotte. Because clearly something had. And why was Charlotte up anyway? He had to go talk to her. Explain. 

Charlotte’s apartment was empty. He had knocked several times and listened carefully before he locked himself in. It felt different and he knew without looking that she had gone. He went back to his own place feeling numb and lost. The next days he camped out by his front door drunk praying for the elevator to say the happy sound. He tried calling her. Texting her. No reply. On the fifth day the elevator announced a visitor and his heart stopped. He leaned against the door frame and listened for the sound of her door opening. It didn’t but it knocked on his. He flung the door open and found himself face to face with Susan. She looked calmly at him, “Get a grip of yourself and take a shower. I’ll wait”, she walked past him and went to his kitchen to put on some coffee. Sidney did as he was told and returned cleaned up and properly dressed in jeans and a cashmere sweater. A cup of piping hot and strong coffee was handed to him and she leaned back, wrapped in an air of cool elegance and pierced him with her beautiful intelligent green eyes and said, “I am never wrong when it comes to matters of the heart. Start talking.” Sidney took a deep breath, looked her straight in the eyes and told her how he had kissed Charlotte, how he lost his nerve because the night had been too perfect to jinx. He had asked her to be his date because he wanted to know what it felt like to be seen with her in public. He had regretted not telling her that he loved her, the minute she had closed the door behind her. Sidney paused before continuing. When he had entered his bedroom, he had undressed only to find out Eliza was there. Naked, lying in his bed, waiting for him. She had locked herself in with the key he had given her back then and forgotten all about. Her aim was to seduce him and create rumors that they were back together to promote the new romantic movie they were starring together. Her husband was directing it and she had convinced him that the old spark between her and Sidney would be good for business. They had argued. He had told her how much he loved Charlotte and that he would try to get out of his contract no matter the cost. She had furiously threatened to ruin his career. “It took me more than an hour to get her to leave. If she hadn’t been naked, I would have tossed her over my shoulder and thrown her into the elevator” He paused and looked heartbroken, ”Instead she ran into the arms of Charlotte.” Sidney drove his hands through his hair and looked up at Susan. “You know where she is, don’t you? How is she...? Is she safe?” Susan nodded, “She is safe, sound and heartbroken in one of my apartments. Here is what we are going to do!” Sidney looked at her surprised and grateful. “You are going to get a hold of yourself, and stop drinking for heaven's sake. I’ll make her go back home. Then it’s up to you from there.” Susan got up and padded him on the shoulder, Sidney hugged her like she was a lifeboat in a storm at sea. “I am never wrong when it comes to love”. And then she was gone. 

Hope wrapped him up like a warm blanket. He went to Charlotte’s apartment to feel near her and found himself going in to her study, the only room he had never been in. The room was big and bright with portraits on the walls grouped after client. There were some real prominent people among. Including Jack and... James Stringer...! All photos had small post it's with comments or quotes pinning the essence of the photo and the person. No wonder she didn’t let anyone in here, it was intimate and raw, and he felt like an intruder. His heart flooded with pride, he admired and respected her so much for her discretion and her respect for other people. She always seemed to draw people to her because of her kind and honest soul and sharp wit. He suddenly found himself looking back at him. “Too boyband” was a repeated comment to most of the photos, he smiled – his press agent would have given up a limb to get these photos but he knew that Charlotte would never let them leave the room... because this wasn’t how she saw him? The answer was on the wall. A close up of him looking at something else than the camera, the eyes full of attention, admiration, affection and love. Charlotte must have taken this photo of him when he thought she was still adjusting the lamps. He had lingered at her lips and listened to her enthusiasm over the new camera. She had written directly on this one, 

“The soul is dyed the color of its thoughts. Think only on those things that are in line with your principles and can bear the light of day. The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you do is who you become. Your integrity is your destiny - it is the light that guides your way.” 

Sidney recognized the quote, it was Heraclitus, her favorite philosopher. 

His eyes welled when he read what she had written below in small capital letters: “I love you...”


	7. Living without her I'd go insane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte returns but something is wrong

After a few agonizing days Charlotte returned. Sidney had allied himself with the doorman who called to inform him. She looked pale and tired when she got out of the elevator. Her spark was gone and her curls had lost their bounce. Sidney held his breath and struggled to stay put in his doorway. Her eyes met his, “Not now...” and then she was gone. For the next hours Sidney sat on the floor leaning his back against his front door. This was the closest he could get and he wanted to be close. His mind tried to process everything and make sense but failed. A faint knock on his door brought him to his feet immediately. 

“I don’t feel...” and then she collapsed. Sidney caught her before she hit the floor and scooped her up in his arms. She was burning up and her breathing was distraught. He carried her to her bed room and placed her gently on the bed, checked her pulse, listened to her chest and then he called Arthur. 

Arthur knocked on the door a few hours later in full personal protection gear. Sidney looked mildly shocked. “There is a pandemic on the rise, COVID19. It’s going to be bad. Italy is in full lockdown and we are already under pressure at the hospital. I have to test you both and if it is the virus, you are both in isolation here for at least a month. Do you understand me? Do you remember your training, Sidney? Can you take care of her?” Sidney nodded; he wouldn’t have it any other way. Arthur took some tests. “The result will come in a few days. Remember isolation. Mary and Georgiana will send over some food.” Arthur paused, “she will be better off here with you than in the hospital. Keep an eye on her lungs. We see young patients as well on respirator”. They carried in the basic medical equipment Arthur had brought and set it up. Charlotte woke up slightly confused but managed to ask Sidney to cancel her appointments before she dozed off again. After Arthur had left Sidney found her laptop and entered the password, she had whispered to him, ‘Heraclitus’. Everything was so organized that he could easily find the contact information needed. He took great effort in phrasing the emails, sending them one at the time and signed, 

On behalf of Miss Heywood  
Yours sincerely,  
Sidney P. 

He set up a carefully composed autoreply as well. 

Charlotte slept uneasily and her breathing was strained but steady. Sidney climbed into bed with her and drew her carefully into his arms. He kissed her on the forehead and whispered, “Charlotte...Love...I know you hate me but I have to stay”. They stayed like that most of the night only interrupted by Sidney checking her vitals every hour. In the early morning her temperature rose and she started coughing. He consulted with Arthur on the phone and did as instructed. To ease her breathing and her coughing he straddled behind her to keep her comfortable while lying in a more upright position. She cradled in his arms with her ear against his chest. It seemed to ease her breathing and reduce the strain of coughing. His t-shirt bulked and left red marks on her damp cheek, he pulled it off to give her more comfort. By evening she wasn’t present enough to drink water on her own, and he had to give her fluids by drop and insert a catheter. He monitored her like this and replaced the bags for the next two days until she seemed to stabilize and vitals showed small progress and she could sip water and some of Mary’s chicken soup. 

Sidney skyped Mary on his laptop, he looked exhausted but calm and collected, “I need help, Mary. I haven’t slept for two days; I need to rest...would you keep an eye on her while I sleep? Just for an hour or two. Call me on my mobile if she... please” Of course Mary would. And she saw how Sidney carefully placed himself behind Charlotte. Holding her and stroking away stray damp curls. How he by instinct held her wrist to monitor her pulse with his index finger even is his sleep. And she watched him sleep and still rock Charlotte gently in his arms. When she seemed uneasy, he kissed her on the top of her head and stroked her back. Mary was proud of him and hoped that Charlotte somehow registered how much love he felt for her. After 5 hours Sidney woke up and carefully unwrapped his long legs from Charlotte and placed her gently on the pile of pillows. He looked at the clock and said softly to Mary, “Thank you, but I said one hour!” She smiled fondly at him, “You needed more. Besides she slept peacefully as well. I’ll watch her a little longer, you go eat some food. She needs you strong and rested – and call her parents! But maybe put on a shirt first”. Sidney blew her kiss. Mary was right, but then again, she always was. After eating and refreshing a bit, he was back and said goodbye to Mary. He decided to sit in chair with Charlotte’s laptop to skype her parents and not the bed. Mr. and Mrs. Heywood were disturbed at first by the news of their daughter but to great comfort in knowing that Mr. Parker took care of her. They talked for a great while and Sidney liked them immediately. He promised to call with a daily update until Charlotte was well enough to call herself. 

The doorman called him and asked what to about all the parcels? Sidney wasn’t quite sure what he was talking about but instructed him to bring them to Miss Heywood’s front door. It was get-well-greetings from Charlotte’s clients; vinyl records, books and beautiful handwritten cards that had been flowing in the past days and kept in storage in the reception. He noticed that there were no flowers, she preferred them in their natural habitat, not cut off in vases. Except a vulgarly large bouquet of roses from James Springer, that idiot. But he had to admit that the card was quite sweet and gentleman like. Yes, he had opened it. There was a big box with soft seamless nightwear and underwear in a silk and cashmere wool mix from Susan and a card for Charlotte of course but also one for him. 

“Dear Sidney, 

Thank you for taking good care of our beloved Charlotte. Call me if you need anything. 

Best of luck, 

Your friend and partner in crime, Susan” 

Charlotte needed more than just a washing with a cloth and a change of nightwear. And since he had seen her private parts, he decided that it would more than ok to draw her a nice bath. While the water was running, he prepared a soft bed of blankets and towels to lay her on after the bath and readied some of the clothes from Susan. He stripped down to his briefs, undressed Charlotte and carefully and gently lowered them both in the tub holding her in his arms. She seemed to take comfort in the warm water and he scrubbed her gently with a big sponge, washed her hair and massaged her aching joints with the bath oil. She felt so tiny and fragile in his strong arms. When he slowly rinsed her hair, she came to for a short second and looked him in the eyes with all kinds of questions in them and mumbled something. He kissed her tenderly on the forehead and explained that she was ill and he wanted to give her comfort. She slid her free arm up and rested her hand on his chest and moved her head to be close to his heartbeat. And then she dozed off again. When she smelled like Charlotte again, he wrapped her in towels and rubbed her dry. She was so beautiful; her naked skin had begun to gain some of its golden glow. He dressed her and carried her back to bed. Her vitals were better and he sat beside her and stroked her hair. 

The next days continued like this. Sidney bathed her every morning after checking her and reporting to Arthur. Massaged her limbs and changed her clothes. She was present enough to sip soup and drink water and sometimes mumbled something, he couldn’t make out. In the early afternoons he would skype her parents. They would talk for an hour or so with Sidney watching Charlotte’s breathing like a hawk. These conversations were dear to him. Her parents shared stories about their stubborn opinionated daughter who could melt an iceberg without trying. They told how she came home bruised from school because she had protected the weak ones, that was the reason they sent her to martial arts training. To teach her how to fight with minimum damage to the bullies and most importantly to herself. Sidney loved these stories. To comfort her while he did his routines, he played music records for her and in the evening, he would read to her while sitting behind her and holding her head close to his naked chest. Like this and in the bathtub was how she seemed to breathe most peacefully. 

Sidney moved nervously around in the chair as he waited for Mr. And Mrs. Heywood to join him online. Their smiling faces greeted him, and Sidney cleared his throat, “Mr. And Mrs. Heywood...” Mr. Heywood interrupted him laughing, “William and Emma, please” Sidney smiled, “Not for this, Sir. Please... Charlotte might not want me, but I would like to ask your permission to court your daughter when she is well again and eventually, hopefully, I’ll ask her to marry me. That is, of course, if she will have me. All I know right now is that I love her and have done so since the moment I first met her.” He looked nervously at the screen. William Heywood looked fondly at the young man, “Well then, Mr. Parker. As you have fully found out by now you can’t really make Charlotte do anything, she doesn’t want to do. And she will most likely continue to be as opinionated and free spirited as she is now and as a result drive you helplessly crazy. If that is what you love about her, Mrs. Parker and I give you our blessings and wish you the best of luck, Son!” Sidney smiled, “I wouldn’t change a single thing about her.” 

As the days and nights passed Charlotte began to respond to his touches. Putting a weak arm around his neck. Grab his hand in her sleep. Or seek his chest with her head in the bath. She sometimes whispered his name and it felt like a cool breeze on a hot summers day. As days passed, she got better and had waking moments where she would watch him work around her or listen to his voice when he read to her. The lovingly made food from Mary and Georgiana gave her strength a little by little. She still slept resting her head on Sidney’s naked chest breathing to his heartbeat. Sometimes he could swear that she stroked his skin in her sleep. 

Finally, Sidney found her strong and present enough to remove the drop and the catheter. It was a small but significant milestone. A few hours later Charlotte tried to get out of bed but failed, and Sidney jumped to her side. “What do you need?” She looked embarrassed at him, “I need to go to the bathroom...but I can’t” He picked her up and carried her there and held her, while she peed. His movements were so professional that she forgot to be embarrassed that he had to hold her. He held her while they washed their hands together and then he carried her back to bed and tucked her in. Sidney allowed himself to fall deeper asleep as her temperature dropped and her breathing improved. He kept on bathing her in the morning as if they had a silent contract. Keeping his tights on. And he still gently rubbed her dry with warm soft towels and helped her dress. Sometimes she dozed off under his caressing touch but mostly she would just watch him and listen to him as he told her what he was doing. They didn’t talk much, but their bodies communicated through these daily routines. Charlotte enjoyed listening to Sidney and her parents talk and laugh, and pretended hard to be fast asleep. 

It had been more than two weeks since Charlotte had collapsed in front of Sidney. They had grown into their routines like an old couple and Charlotte’s broken heart had mended along with her recovery. Susan had told her what had happened that night. How Eliza had tricked both of them. She had to admit that she had spent longer time in Susan’s apartment because she didn’t quite know how reach out to Sidney and get back to where they left off. When she finally did go home it was because her head and body was aching and she just wanted to be near him. But by the time she reached Sanditon Terrace she had felt nauseous and ill, and she didn’t want him to see her that way. So, she had turned him away. 

“Can I do something for you?”, Sidney’s dark voice hit her ear as a warm kiss. Charlotte sat up and Sidney immediately assisted and adjusted the pillows. “Please tell me about... all this. How long have we been here? How are you feeling? How ill was I? Please, just...” Sidney cleared his throat and told her how she had collapsed in his arms, Arthur in protective gear, the virus, how he had checked her scared half to death that he might lose her, all the food from Mary and Georgiana stocked in hers and his freezer, his thoughts about bathing her, even though... the nights he held her to help her breathe, the video calls to her parents. He was very cautious not to pour his heart out and ask her if she meant what she had written on his photo. Charlotte listened without saying a word and vague memories of his soothing hands, embracing arms and beating heart emerged. “Uh, I have a surprise for you!” Sidney picked her up in his arms and carried her to the big soft sofa in the living room, she had lost so much weight these weeks and he feared he might break her somehow. She was normally so strong and confident in everything she did, but now she seemed so fragile that he felt he had to protect her from the entire world including himself. “Are you going to carry me for the rest of my life?” she mumbled against his neck. “If you’ll let me”, he whispered in her curls. He placed her gently on the sofa and tucked a blanket around her, “Wait here!” He went to the kitchen and returned with a big tray, poured her a cup of hot tea with honey, and hoped that she could take a bite or two of the fluffy pancakes he had heated for her. 

For the next hours Sidney opened presents for her and read the cards out loud to her. Charlotte both laughed and shed a tear over the many caring messages and the thoughtful gifts. “This is too much... these are very busy people...I simply cannot...” Sidney understood perfectly why someone like her could own the respect and affection of her clientele. You only had to be in her company for a very short while to feel like she had known you your entire life and saw your true and best self. When he had read all the cards and opened all the presents, he got up, “I’ll make dinner. Call me if you need me. And call your parents”. As he walked away from her toward the kitchen, she called out. He turned, “Thank you, Sidney. For everything.” 

Charlotte called up her parents on the computer and started crying the minute she saw them. The distance felt like lightyears. Mr. and Mrs. Heywood shed a tear as well, happy to see her recovered. They praised Sidney for taking such good care of her and for calling them every day. Charlotte blushed, “Yes, he has been wonderful”. Her father nodded, “Sidney is a very special young man and we look forward to meet him in person. You are lucky to have him in your life, my dear”. Those were big words from her father, who hated the idea of any young man in Charlotte’s life in general, and it made Charlotte’s cheeks turn a darker color of red. 

After a delicious lasagna they decided to put on a movie. Sidney sat in the opposite corner and watched Charlotte more than the movie. She looked pale and tired, but much better. He was grateful and happy that he didn’t have to fight her to let him stay. “Would you mind...sitting behind me like...it’s easier for me to...” Before she had composed a full sentence, Sidney had lifted her up and placed her in his lap and pulled her close to him, holding her like a small child. The minute she could hear his heart beat her breathing relaxed. Sidney had forgotten what they were watching, all he could think of was Charlotte in his arms and that she had wanted to be there. She had fallen asleep minutes after and he had just held her and dropped soft kisses on her curls and buried his nose in her hair and breathed in her scent. She didn’t seem indifferent to him and he dared to feel hope. When the movie ended, he carried her to bed and pulled her in close so she could rest her head in the cave between his arm and chest. And he fell sound asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look, I am not a medical expert, so please don't hate the med details for being flawed or down right wrong. It's a prop to get Sidney and Charlotte together, nothing else :-)


	8. She's taken my heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sidney finally tells Charlotte that he loves her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are getting very explicit her.

Something was wrong. Sidney woke up after a full night's sleep, the first one in weeks, but Charlotte was gone. The door to the bathroom was open and he could hear the shower running, and then a thump sound and Charlotte complaining quietly, he had never moved so quickly before and found her sitting exhausted in the shower. “What are you doing out of bed? You should have woken me up and let me help you. (his voice broke) What if something had happened to you?”, Sidney sounded angrier than she had deserved, but the sound had scared the shit out of him. “When you are done scolding me, could you help me finish wash my hair, it seems to take the strength of a strong man today.” She laughed embarrassed, he was right, she was not strong enough yet. Oddly she didn’t find it embarrassing to be naked in front of him. He had conducted the bathing routine in the bathtub in such a respectful manner that she felt comfortable in front of him. Her eyes found his, “I didn’t want to wake you up, you slept so peacefully and you needed sleep after taking care of me all this time”. By the time she had finished the sentence, Sidney had removed his clothes, except his chaperoning briefs and picked her up in the shower. 

Being in the shower, fronting him, with his arms around her felt so much more intimate than being in the bathtub. His body felt alarmingly attractive under the pouring water. Her breathing changed, “Why are you here, Sidney? Why are you doing all this?”, she looked him straight in the eyes. They were so close, and as easy it had been for him to replace desire with care these past weeks, as hard was it for him now when the strong and confusing Charlotte was back and pierced him with her big brown eyes. He craned her with one arm around her waist and stroked a few stray wet curls behind her ear and traced his finger along the beautiful contours of her face and stroked her plump lips with his thumb. “Because I love you. I have loved you for so long and I have tried my very best to be worthy of you and do things right. I wanted to tell you that night after the kiss, but the moment was so perfect and I wanted to preserve it like that, in case you didn’t feel the same. I wanted to tell you the next day but then Eliza messed everything up and you...” His voice trembled and tears mixed with the water. Charlotte had kept eye contact and now she cupped his face and just before her lips caught his in a kiss, she whispered, “I love you too. So much”. He pulled her in as if he was scared that she would disappear again and kissed her with all the love and desire he had built up in all this time. Their tongues played slowly together, taking their time to build up desire and set fire to every fiber. Charlotte trailed her hands down Sidney’s sides and pulled down his briefs until she couldn’t reach longer where after a smooth foot took over and pushed them the rest of the way. Sidney’s hand moved down her bum and pressed her sensitive parts against his rock-hard erection and then further down to lift her up. Charlotte wrapped her legs around his waist, in that short second their hips were slightly apart he slipped into her soaking wet cave. She started moving, pulling apart just the smallest bit, but it was the most arousing thing Sidney had ever experienced. And he was soooo close, “Charlotte, Sweetheart, keep still...please”, he whispered hoarsely in her ear. 

He carried her to bed ignoring the wet mess they made and lay them down with him still inside her. They kissed slowly and demanding while Sidney tried to resist his urge to just thrust inside her. “Are you sure about this, Charlotte?” She nodded and kissed him. Slowly he pulled out and trailed her wet skin with kisses, taking his time with her nipples and cupping her breasts. He kissed her slowly all the way down her smooth skin on her stomach and drank the water from her navel. Oh lord, she tasted good. His tongue licked her skin until it found the little sensitive pearl between her thighs. He stayed there for a while, sucking, kissing and licking. Charlotte arched her back and grasped on to his hair, panting for breath. He was drawn to her entrance and pierced her with his tongue and pushed it in and out and sucked up her juices, then he returned to the nob and kissed and sucked before fucking her again with his tongue. Her breathing sounded like a spring being wound up and when he felt her orgasm getting close, he started kissing and licking his way up again to her lips. His tip teased her wet entrance before thrusting slowly all the way in. It didn’t take more than a few slow thrusts before the string snapped and their bodies exploded in fireworks and a hot flooding orgasm. Sidney stayed on top of her, inside her, breathing heavily. Charlotte had cried out his name as she came and lay panting for breath. He kissed her with all the love in the world, and slid down next to her when his body was able to move again. They were facing each other and just taking the other one in. Sidney stroked her cheek and moved down to her breast...His eyes was full of love and happiness. 

“That was... It never felt like this before. I love you” 

“Yes, it was... and I love you too” 

Charlotte dozed off in his arms, still quite weak and not fully recovered. He stroked her hair and her back and felt guilty for giving in to his desires, he had completely forgotten how fragile she was the second she had kissed him and wrapped her smooth legs around him. At the same time his heart swelled with happiness and love, a few hours ago it had seemed like a hopeless dream, but now she was here, naked, in his arms. He dotted soft kisses on her head, and hoped it didn’t wake her up, but he couldn’t help himself. 

Hours later Charlotte slowly opened her brown eyes and caught his. “Is this real?”, she asked drowsily, “do you love me or did I just dream again?”. Sidney kissed her tenderly, “I sure hope so, or I’m dreaming too, and I want this to be real so bad.” A tear trailed from her eye down her freckled nose, “I love you”, she whispered faintly. Sidney kissed the tear away, “I love you too”, he smiled at her. “We still have to take care of you – we should eat something.” He helped her go to the bathroom and helped her get dressed in some of Susan’s soft nightwear and carried her into the living room. “Stay here, sleep if you can, and I’ll bring you some soup.” 

Sidney kept the promise he made to himself to keep his hands of Charlotte until she was stronger. She tired easy and he and his desire had to remember that. The evening was spent much like the previous with Charlotte nestled against his naked chest listening to his heartbeat and his soft dark voice reading out loud to her. Every time she took a bite of food or sipped a cup of tea, some hot chocolate or just cold water, he thanked the higher powers. Eventually she blushed with fatigue and he carried her to the bedroom to get her ready for bed. “Could we sleep naked please?”, Charlotte blushed and her innocent brown doe eyes met his, “not to make love, I just want to feel your skin against mine, feel that this is real. Please?”. Sidney cleared his throat and nodded. Charlotte naked in his arms after this morning, he would have to recite all the states in alphabetical order not to overstep the boundaries of her health. But he had no intention of denying her anything. Not ever. So, Sidney tucked them in and pulled Charlotte close and touched her forehead with his. He had to remind the traitor between his legs that her naked body wasn’t an invitation to play. Charlotte fell asleep the second Sidney wrapped his strong arms around her and his heart sang her a lullaby. Sidney was wide awake for hours, terrified that his body might deceive him in his sleep. But in the end, he too slept soundly. 

Her lips woke him up. She traced the handsome contours of his face with her soft lips. 

Charlotte wrapped her leg around his hip and pulled him close and inside her. They moved. Slowly at first but then increasing pace and rhythm. Sidney’s free hand played with her butt, sliding his finger up and down the soft slope between her buttocks. He kissed his way from her mouth down her neck, sucking and biting on her earlobe. It drove her crazy. Every time she felt climax was near, he slowed down or stopped and then brought her up the peak again. She tried to push herself against him to race for the orgasm, but he was too strong. “Are you ready for me, Sweetheart?”, he bit her chin and looked at her. She nodded and sucked at his bottom lip as he started moving inside her again ever so gently until his release pushed a secret button inside her and send her over the edge. The roar that came from both of them was deep and animal like. Charlotte felt as if every muscle in her body had left her. Sidney would have to either keep her in bed or carry her around, she would never be able to move again. He kissed her tenderly and sent her wide and bright and silly happy smile. Her stomach rumbled. “We should probably eat something”, he laughed. 

Breakfast was a messy thing with eating, kissing, licking and lovemaking. "You are killing me, Woman”, Sidney gasped with Charlotte still straddling him on one of the kitchen chairs. She kissed him in response and tossed a piece of bread in the air and caught it with her mouth. “Nonsense, Mr. Parker. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted you. It could have been much worse, but I’m still a little weak.” All color disappeared from Sidney’s face, “This is hardly recovery and rest for you. And I have forgotten to check you this morning... and Arthur...” Charlotte kissed him softly, “I have never felt better. A little sore perhaps...” she smiled and nodded towards their joined sexes. He cupped her face and placed the most tender kiss on her lips and carried her to the bedroom to do the check up and confer with Arthur. Charlotte still ran a mild temperature and Sidney decided as her doctor that they should turn up being fully clothed, talking and eating solids meals and turn down... well, being naked and fucking. 

While Charlotte napped, Sidney received a text from his agent. "Italian lock-down, the movie is postponed indefinitely. What clause in your contract do you want to activate?" Sidney sent a short text back, "I want out". 

Charlotte insisted on eating dinner at the kitchen table, she lit some candles and put on a record while Sidney heated up a casserole from Mary and Georgiana’s care package following the instructions with great care, Sidney was hopeless in a kitchen, but he insisted that heating food was within his capacity, “I’ll order some fresh fruit and vegetables for us tomorrow”, he said. This daily-thing-remark sent a warm feeling through Charlotte, she took him in, he looked golden and warm and wonderful in the candle light. He felt like home and she loved him for everything he was. 

“When did you know?”, Charlotte asked with blushing cheeks. She was curled up in Sidney’s lap in front of the fireplace. “That I was in love with you?”, Sidney had his nose in her hair and played with a stray curl with his free hand. She nodded. “I was drawn to you from the moment you so rudely stumbled into my life and disturbed my peace. I wanted to avoid you but found myself seeking your company at any given chance and I admit that I created a large part of those chances. And by the time you showed me the portrait of you as a child I was hopelessly in love and knew that I would do anything in my power to keep you in my life. You are so pure in everything you do and how you are, that I wasn’t sure that you could ever think of me as anything else than an annoying arrogant brute of a neighbor.” Sidney paused for a while and kissed her curly head “but I knew that I had to try. That I had to see myself as someone worthy of you and prove my reputation wrong to myself before I could expect you to even consider...You were... You are... my guiding star, my St Christopher. I like who I am around you, my best and truest self.” Tears shed quietly down Charlotte’s cheeks and he kissed them softly away and dotted kisses on her face until he found her mouth. He pulled away and smiled, “Now it’s your turn. When did my overwhelming charm wheel you in?” Charlotte smiled, “If I have to date it, I would have to say that evening with your friends and family. When such fine people found you worthy of love, I might dare to risk my heart (she laughed but turned serious again) But I have to say that I have never seen you act against the way I see you and love you. The way you are with your family, your nephews, your friends, my parents and me. Your Christmas presents were so full of love and consideration, that I dared to let my love for you grow. Your call on New Year’s Eve meant the world to me. I missed you so much and you were the only one I wanted to kiss that night - and any night after that. You have no idea how many times I came close to tell you... And I am so sorry that I didn’t trust you enough to let you explain yourself that night and that I let Eliza make me doubt your integrity and affection for me. You did not deserve that. I should have trusted what you told me and how your kiss made me feel. I should have trusted you” Her eyes glistened with tears, “and the way you have taken care of me these past weeks despite of that. Without knowing if your feelings were returned... You have no idea...” Her voice broke and she took a deep breath, Sidney wiped her tears away. Charlotte continued, “That night I fell ill I just knew I needed you.” Sidney pulled her to his chest. “I didn’t know. I didn’t dare to hope.”, he whispered. 

She kissed the skin on his neck, first softly and then hungrily, sliding her hand down his body, “but my body wanted you from the second I landed in your arms that day you helped me with the books. And you have no idea how much I wanted to jump you when I saw you naked fresh out of the shower” Sidney laughed and pulled her away to look her in the eyes again, “No more sex for you today, Miss Heywood. Doctor’s orders” and then he carried her to bed. It turned out that the doctor couldn’t resist his insisting patient for very long.


	9. She's like the wind through my tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte recovers and Sidney has to chaperone them both

The next morning Charlotte’s temperature was normal, Sidney and Arthur were contempt with the rest of the vitals. Charlotte had tested positive on the COVID19 test, but Arthur didn’t trust the antibody test, that Sidney had taken was reliable enough and insisted that they stayed isolated for the next 14 days anyway. If Sidney didn’t show any symptoms during that time, they could follow the normal COVID19 guidelines. Arthur looked at them both through the webcam and suddenly noticed how close they sat and Sidney’s protective arm around Charlotte, “Georgiana, Mary and Esther will kill me, if they find out, I knew first, but do you two have something you want to tell me?” Charlotte blushed and Sidney smiled proudly, “Well, dear brother. I am beginning to think that I have done a very poor job hiding my feelings for Charlotte. If you are asking if Charlotte knows, that I love her, the answer is yes. If that makes you wonder if she returns those feelings, the answer is yes. And it feels good to tell someone.” Sidney kissed Charlotte on the cheek “Well”, Arthur replied, “It took you both long enough, and I can assure we are all thrilled that you FINALLY figured it out after all these months. I wonder whose bet came closest?” “You all placed bets on us!?!”, Sidney blurted out. “You would have done the same after seeing someone dance together like you did that evening”, Arthur laughed, “Come to think of it, you did! Remember Tom and Mary’s first dance?” Sidney shrugged his shoulders laughing and looked at Charlotte, “He has a point. I did – it was so obvious that those two belonged together. It was just a matter of time. A very short time it turned out.” 

Mr. and Mrs. Heywood noticed the change in Charlotte. Her eyes were brighter than ever before, her cheeks were blushing and she looked very happy. They chatted away for a while until her father approached the webcam to look his daughter closer in the eyes, “Where are you hiding Sidney, my dear girl?” Charlotte called for him and he sat down next to her with blushing cheeks and a happy smile. “Well, Mr. Parker. How are things with the blessings?” William and Emma looked very amused. Sidney’s face grew red, and Charlotte looked utterly confused by the implied look her parents sent him. Sidney looked lovingly at her and back into the webcam and flashed a bright happy smile. “Well, Sir, I would like to cash in those blessings” and then he drew Charlotte close and kissed her. Now it was Charlotte who turned red, and her parents laughed. “Well done, Sidney, well done. The girl is speechless for once, you might stand a small chance”, her father said. They all laughed and talked for a while longer before saying goodbye. “You asked my parents for permission to love me?”, she asked. “Yes, I did. Is that so hard to understand?” Charlotte shook her head, “No, what is hard to understand, is that my father gave you that permission without having met you in person. Maybe holding a rifle at you while interrogating about your intentions with his daughter. He has never been keen on men in my life. You are quite something, Sidney Parker”. 

That night they made love. Sidney drank in the vision of Charlotte on top of him moving slowly up and down, scratching his skin passionately with her nails. Her breasts were plump with desire and her nipples hard and pointy. He raised to suck, bite and kiss them. His hands alternately cupped her breasts and grabbed her buttocks and pulled her even closer. He lifted himself in an upright position to kiss her and her long smooth legs wrapped around his waist and they moved together holding on to each other as tight as they could. He used his right hand on her butt to push her close, his right hand caressed her neck and held her head while he sucked on the soft skin on her neck. Their mouths and tongues met in a breathless hungry kiss, as their orgasm came in like a big wave building up until it hit the beach with the force of nature. It flooded their bodies and Sidney collapsed with Charlotte still on top. “Please stay like this”, he whispered in her ear. And they fell asleep like that with Sidney still inside of her. 

During the night his hands started to explore her naked body in his sleep and he grew harder and bigger inside her and began to move. She responded by licking and biting the skin on his neck. Half-asleep and half-awake they increased the pace and moved hungryly and avidly. His long fingers fanned out to touch as much of her smooth skin on her back and butt. She had her arms around his neck and held on to him as hard as she could. Her lips moved up his neck and got a bit ruffled by his stubble before they found safe harbor against his soft lips. It felt like they melted together inside her and she could feel every beat of every thick vain as they moved. The sensation was so tender and so intense that she began to moan against his hot mouth. Sidney’s hands touched and teased, his fingers loved the spot between her buttocks and slid up and down soaked of the sweat from their bodies and her juices. Suddenly the world disappeared in a bright white light and he yelled out her name as he came. Charlotte whined as she followed and slid exhausted off his body. They faught to catch their breath and when their eyes found each other, they laughed as they gasped for air. Sidney pulled her in and kissed her on her sweaty forehead. Her curls were damp and she looked absolutely breathtaking. “I’m sorry about that, I don’t know what got into him”, he laughed and looked apologetic down at his now soft member. “We didn’t mind”, she smiled and nodded towards the dark curls between her legs glistening as if they were covered in morning dew. Sidney turned serious “I love you more and more every second. I can’t believe we wasted so much time while in love.” Charlotte stroked his cheek and wiped away a tear, “It wasn’t wasted. We grew closer and our love had time to grow – I have treasured every moment with you and...” She froze. Sidney lifted her chin, “What is it, Sweetheart”, his eyes examined her face, desperate to find out what was wrong. “I don’t... You haven’t... we haven’t...” Sidney looked softly at her, “We haven’t what, Charlotte?”. “Protection”, she whispered, “I’m not taking any pills”. Sidney got out of bed without a word and still naked. She could hear him leave the apartment, leaving the door open, opening his own door, close it a few minutes later, close her door, before he finally returned with something in his hand. Though a bit nervous and wondering what Sidney had left the apartment naked for, Charlotte couldn’t help but laugh, “I’m glad that you didn’t have to leave the building” and the insecurity was back in her big brown eyes and she looked questioningly at him. Sidney climbed back into bed with her, placed himself in front of her and pulled her to his lap facing him. 

“I have never wanted to put myself in someone else’s power before. I have never wanted to care for anyone but myself. But then I met you, I fell in love with you, and I am forever in your power and I want to care for you forever. The day after you showed me the picture of you with all the Forget-Me-Not-flowers in your hair, I found this ring at a shop with vintage jewelry.” Sidney opened the box and took out a stunning ring. Thin gold band with a Forget-Me-Not-flower beautifully and yet simply designed with small blue sapphires, green emerald and yellow citrine. “What I am saying is, you have had my heart for quite some time and I bought this ring praying that I would one day ask you to marry me”. He sank and continued, “I still want that more than anything. I want to start a family with you and if that adventure starts from this moment, I couldn’t be happier. So, Miss Charlotte Heywood, will you do me the honor and marry me? You decide when and where, as long as I don’t have to leave your side ever again.” Charlotte sat in complete silence, her eyes had tears in them and it looked like they had golden shimmer in them. She nodded with a big teary smile, Sidney placed the ring on her left ring finger and kissed her. “Speechless again”, he joked, “your father might be on to something. I’m on a roll here.” Charlotte gasped, “My parents, what will they say? We’ve only known each other for 8 or 9 months!” Sidney smiled, “Well, I don’t think it will be a big surprise to them, I asked them for your hand in marriage last week.” Charlotte laughed, “I guess, I’m speechless again.” He lay her down and covered her with his body. His eyes were dark and he sent her a piercing glaze that set of little fireworks in her body. He whispered in her ear, “Are you ready for me, Mrs. Parker?” 

The next morning Charlotte woke up, she could hear Sidney humming in the shower. She looked at the small delicate ring on her finger and felt so happy she could burst. It was beautiful and caught the rays of sun beaming through the windows. Lazily she donned a silk nightshirt and went to watch her fiancée in the shower. He came out of the shower as she entered and felt her hungry eyes on him. She pushed him up against the wall and kissed him, following the trail of water droplets. Licking and biting his nipples and sliding her hands down his chiseled body. Her lips and tongue moved further and further down until she knelt before him and licked the water of the silky soft skin on his erection. Sidney groaned and leaned against the wall to keep his balance. His fingers dove into her curls, it was the sexiest thing he had ever seen. Charlotte wasn’t very experienced at this, but somehow her mouth knew how to give him most pleasure. She grasped his thighs and let her hands play with his muscles, cup his behind and the soft trail of skin between his legs. She licked the length of him, sucked and kissed the sensitive tip and bit him gently. Every touch sent electric impulses through his body and he had to tighten his muscles to keep standing. Her mouth and tongue made him bigger and harder for every suck or lick, he didn’t fit in her mouth but it felt like she had covered him in melted chocolate, he couldn’t hold back much longer, and when she took him further in and her tongue slid all the way up to the tip, he pulled her head back and roared out his orgasm spilling most of it over her cheeks. “I’m sorry, that was... I pulled out too late”, Charlotte looked up at him, still kneeling, “I didn’t want you to pull out”, and then, oh lord have mercy, she licked her mouth. 

Sidney picked her up, “Let’s get you washed, I made a mess out of you”. The silk nightgown was soaked from his wet body and it clung to her breasts, butt and the dark curls between her legs. It looked very sexy and he lifted her, so he could suck her nipples through the thin fabric before he pulled it away with his teeth. He turned on the shower and put her on the narrow build-in-shelf for shampoo and placed himself between her legs. He turned on the water and kissed her neck first and moved slowly up to her earlobe. She groaned and tried to rub herself against him. “I’ve got you, Sweetheart”. A finger darted inside her and caressed her gently, looking for that secret spot. “Can you take another one?”, he whispered in her ear, blowing on her wet skin. She nodded breathlessly and spread her legs a little more, and Sidney slowly took his finger out to join it with one more. He slid in and out of her, curving his fingers so they massaged the top of her cave. The thumb on the other hand stroked her sensitive pearl. His mouth kept her occupied when it didn’t wander off to suck a nipple or bite her gently in the shoulder. When he could feel her reaching the top, he was hard again and removed his finger to enter her. “Come for me, Charlotte. Let it out”. And Charlotte screamed his name as her walls contracted in an orgasm and pulled his second release out of him. He stroked the wet curls away from her face and kissed her. 

To be honest Sidney and Charlotte were naked for most of the two weeks in isolation. They primarily dressed to videocall her parents, his family or their friends. Their bruised lips and flushing cheeks revealed that they were very much in love and got the very most out of the isolation. One afternoon Charlotte found Sidney in the kitchen holding an icepack to his groin. She flushed, “Have I been that hard on you, my love?”. He held out his hand as if to stop her from coming any closer, “do you think we could give him a small break?” She nodded, “I was wondering, that song Crowe sang the evening, we danced for the first time. Do you know it?” Sidney looked surprised, “You don’t?” She shook her head. “Come on! We will have to rectify that. It is one of the most famous romantic movies of all time. Mary loves it. I even think Esther has seen it more than once.” He picked her up and carried her to the living room and placed her in the sofa and straddles his long legs around her. “You are in for a treat, my dear. Let me present, ‘Dirty Dancing’”. Charlotte loved the movie, “I think you have to show me more of your favorite chick flicks, Mr. Parker” Her face lit up, “I have an idea that doesn’t involve sex! Let’s practice the dance and the lift”. Sidney laughed but agreed and so they started copying the dance, frame by frame. The first few times they didn’t make it past him sliding his hand down her body before he forgot his sore body part and took her right there on the floor. But after some days of practicing, they had the entire dance routine down – even the lift. Sidney dosed it like a dictator, she still tired easy and her breathing strained, but Charlotte sparkled with love, laughter and the joy of using her body. She had never been indoor for such a long period of time before or used her body so very little. “That was our first dance as Mr. And Mrs. Parker”, Sidney said as he bowed and kissed her hand. Charlotte had blushed most dearly. 

One of the last nights of their isolation Charlotte woke up in the middle of the night to find Sidney gone. She found him in the living room where he sat in almost darkness. “What is it, Sidney?” She sat on his lap and stroked his brown hair. “This thing, this virus, it is so devastating. Caring for you has been the most meaningful thing I have done in years. Would it be alright with you if I volunteer at the hospital?” She looked at him with love, “You don’t need my permission for that”. Sidney’s handsome face turned dark, he cupped her face with his hand and locked her eyes, “Yes I do. This is what I promised you. We decide these things together. This is not a small thing, if I go it will be long shifts. I will put myself at risk of infection. I’m not even sure, that you are immune and that I can’t infect you. But I do know that I can’t do it if we have to be apart; I have to be able to come home to you every night.” She looked at him with love, pride and admiration, 

“Out of every one hundred men, ten shouldn't even be there, eighty are just targets, nine are the real fighters, and we are lucky to have them, for they make the battle. Ah, but the one, one is a warrior, and he will bring the others back - I have never been prouder of you or loved you more. Go do, but come home to me. Promise?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember, still not a doctor :-)


	10. She is my St Christopher, my Northern Star

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte and Sidney starts a new chapter. It is hard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ran out of suitable lines from the song :-)

Charlotte woke up some hours later by a soft knock on the door, kissed Sidney tenderly on the forehead and crept out of bed to let him sleep. She wrapped herself up in big blanket from the sofa and peeped out in the hallway. The fruit and vegetables had been delivered. The box was too heavy for her to lift and she cursed silently while she dragged it inside. A little short of breath she placed herself in the sofa with a book and a small box of strawberries. Lost in her book, she didn’t notice Sidney until he sat at the other end of the sofa, he had only donned a pair of jeans. 

“Goodmorning, Love”, she said and took a bite of a strawberry. 

“Don’t do that”, his voice was tense and dark. 

“Don’t do what?” Charlotte looked puzzled; his gaze felt like laser on her skin, there was a sexy danger hanging around him she had never experienced before. She felt both nervous and intrigued. 

“Eat strawberries like that. It makes me want to strip you naked and take you”, his jaw clenched and his eyes glowed with darkness and animal lust. 

“Strip me naked, huh? I’m afraid that is not possible”, the mischief in her voice made him insecure and he clenched his jaw even more. 

“Why not?” 

Charlotte looked at him through her long eye lashes, took a big bite of a new strawberry while she kept his eyes locked and then she pulled away the plaid and revealed her naked body, “Because I’m already naked”, and then she nested the last bite of her strawberry on the dark curls on her sex. She lifted an eyebrow, “Your call, Mr. Parker!”. 

In one movement Sidney opened his jeans, pulled her by her feet down in supine position, grabbed the strawberry with his teeth and entered her in one thrust. He buried his face in her soft neck, slid his arms under her and clung to her for dear life. A cry like the sound of a hurt animal submerged from deep inside of him as he moved in and out of her. Charlotte wrapped her arms and legs around him and tried to absorb him to keep him safe and remove the pain, she could sense from him. A few minutes later he roared his release into her neck and broke down in tears. His entire body trembled as his tears trailed from her neck, down her breast and puddled in her navel. Her legs held him tight and her hands stroked him softly while she hummed soothingly. Sidney followed her voice through the myriad of thoughts and emotions that clouded his mind; Despair. Charlotte ill. Charlotte naked. Sadness. Charlotte’s smile. Charlotte boarding a plane with James Stringer. Eliza naked. Arthur in protection suit. Charlotte’s naked back in the black dress. Desire. Charlotte heartbroken. His ripped-out heart. Eliza hurting Charlotte. Fear. Charlotte gone. Arthur’s tales from the hospital. Susan. Hope. Holding Charlotte in her sleep. Charlotte coming. Charlotte laughing. Charlotte collapsing. Love... Sidney was lost at sea. When all his tears had left him, he raised himself on his elbows and sought her big brown eyes. They sparkled like a bright starry night and he navigated by them like The Northern Star back to safe harbor, back to her. Every thought and emotion silenced. There was only Charlotte. Charlotte safe. Charlotte in his arms. Charlotte loving him. He drank her in before he without any care for the mess of tears and snot he had left on her skin kissed her with all the love he had in his body. His tongue caressed her lips with such tenderness, it was a sharp contrast to the brute force he had fucked her with minutes before. Charlotte pushed his jeans further down with her feet and cupped his behind with her hands, guiding him inside her again. Sidney slowly lowered his body and started moving in a tender loving pace, this time careful not to crush her. His eyes didn’t leave hers, as if he was scared to get lost again. Every fiber in her pulled him ashore, his entire being merged with hers. Their orgasm was soothing, uniting and quiet. 

Sidney rested his head between her arm and a perfect round breast and alternately toyed quietly with a nipple and traced the curve of her breast with his finger. None of them spoke a word. After a while he looked up at her and whispered, “Thank you. I’m sorry. I don’t know what...”, she silenced him with a kiss, “I do. I know. I am here, I am safe and I love you. I’ve got you”. That almost made him cry again, fighting back the tears he looked down at the sticky mess he had made on both of them, he found her eyes again and smiled, “we should probably shower and get something to eat!” Charlotte laughed and kissed him, “I do believe you are right, Mr. Parker.” 

They sat in the kitchen, Charlotte rested her feet in Sidney’s lap and he massaged them while they processed how they felt about getting back to reality. It felt like a really big step to burst the intense and intimate bubble they had shared for almost 5 weeks; it had just been the two of them 24/7. Sidney’s first shift was three days away. As much as he wanted to make a difference as much, he hated the thought of being away from her. Leaving her alone. She was still something that could vanish in thin air and then he would be lost at sea again. 

“I have an idea”, Charlotte opened – hesitating a bit. Sidney looked at her. “I don’t want you to have a long drive from the hospital to be with me, it’s not safe when you are tired after a long shift...-” 

Sidney interrupted her, “I am not leaving you...” 

“Please, hear me out.” Her voice was soft and he lowered his shoulders again. “Mary and Tom live close by the hospital, do you think we could find a way to stay with them, without putting them at risk? In the annex perhaps. I could help Mary with the children... and quite frankly I think that we both would feel safer if I wasn’t alone... do you think they would be fine with that?”. 

Sidney kissed her feet, “I think it is a wonderful idea.” He trusted Mary. 

They called Mary and Tom, who both were very excited about the idea. Charlotte could move freely, but Sidney had to stay in the annex, and of course they would all have to follow a strict regime of hygiene. That was nothing new to the Parker siblings. They were out of a proud line of doctors, including one of the first female doctors in America. The four siblings were no excuse, Diana was an obstetrician with her own clinic, Arthur was a surgeon at a hospital, Tom was an epidemiologist and Sidney had been headed down the pediatric road. Sidney loved all of them, but he was closest to Arthur in both age and temper. Tom was a walking confirmation of a genius but distraught scientist, and the new virus had spiraled both. He worked at all hours and Mary had long ago had the house furnished with some professional facilities. 

And so, it was done. Charlotte and Sidney moved into the annex and began their new routines. The press had a field day with Sidney returning as a doctor, it annoyed him but at least it created an awareness about the virus. Charlotte enjoyed having access to a big garden and four children to accompany her. She did however forget too quickly that she was still recovering and Mary took action. 

“Charlotte, we have to set some ground rules. You cannot run around outside like nothing happened. Don’t you believe that I haven’t seen you lose your breath. It won’t do.” 

Charlotte wanted to protest but Mary had that motherly firm look in her eyes, that could silence all 4 children – and even the three Parker men when she wasn’t pleased with their behavior. 

Mary continued with a slight tremble in her voice, “You were so ill. Do you know that Sidney stayed awake for days because he was too scared to fall asleep and let you out of his sight? When he finally did, he made me monitor you. He even called me because he wanted to learn to braid your hair because your curls stuck to your cheeks and got in your eyes and he wanted to do anything in his power to make you comfortable. I have never seen him like that before. And now he has trusted me again to keep an eye on the person he loves more than anyone or anything else in the world, and I am not going to let him down. You can play with the children, you can be outside, but you CANNOT RUN or PLAY BALL, and you will take a nap every afternoon.” 

Charlotte hugged her. “You are right. I am sorry. I will do whatever you say.”  
Mary hugged her back, “You better, because I have never seen Sidney this happy before. And he deserves it more than he knows.” 

Homeschooling was greatly improved by Charlotte. She cut out numbers and they did math as stop motion movies. When it was time for her nap, the children took turns in reading for her. Mary smiled every time Charlotte made something in to a game. It was obvious why Sidney had fallen so hard in love with her. 

Sidney would come home after his shifts, throw his clothes in washer, shower thoroughly before kissing Charlotte. The first shift had been hard but rewarding and he had talked like a child about his day while he undressed her until her naked skin occupied his lips. He needed to feel her when he came home no matter the time of day and Charlotte knew. 

A week or so into their new live things had been crazy at the hospital and Sidney and Arthur had worked with only a few naps for 46 hours straight. Charlotte was ready with a hot meal when he came home, but he took her hand and pushed her gently up the wall. He framed her with his arms against the wall and looked her in the eyes until he found his way home and then he kissed her. Soft and tenderly at first until his hunger for her took over. He pulled up her dress and slid her briefs aside. His fingers moved carefully around her bud and in and out of her until she was wet and ready. When he felt her moaning against his mouth, he lifted her up and wrapped her legs around him, he fumbled a bit to find her entrance until her hand reached down and guided him in. The minute her warm sex enveloped him his body changed. His tensions disappeared and his jaw relaxed. He just stood there, inside her, supporting them both against the wall, without moving. “You need to sleep, Sidney”, she whispered in his ear. “I need you more”, he mumbled back and started moving. After a while his kissing felt like the old Sidney. He couldn’t both hold her up and cup her breasts so he took his time with her earlobes and neck. Licking only to blow on the wet skin, biting only to soothe with a kiss. She had her arms around his neck and tried to help him hold her. All she could think of was how good he felt inside her. How close their bodies were. The contrast between his warm body and the cold wall. She tilted her head to give him access to her neck. He fucked her like this for a while and then he stopped and found her eyes, “I’m too tired, my legs are giving in” Before she could tell him it was alright, he continued, “I’m carrying you to bed”. Just like the first time they made love, Sidney maneuvered their bodies onto the bed without slipping out of her. “Let me”, she whispered and made him roll over putting her on top. She would never tire of the way he looked at her. His eyes felt like a warm touch. His hands traced her body slowly up to her breasts and cupped them. He wanted to lift himself to kiss them but he was too tired. Charlotte trailed the muscles on his torso with her finger and grasped his shoulders to increase the pace. “Come on, Sidney. Just let go, my love”. His hands moved down and cupped her buttocks to pull her closer. He used his hands to slide her up and down, pressing her against him. He could feel warmth building up in his body like at hot wave. His eyes locked on the galaxy in hers as he yelled her name in worship and surfed the wave ashore and came inside her. Charlotte was so close and pushed herself against his body until she finally followed him over the edge and collapsed on him. Sidney fell asleep thinking that she was the sexiest woman he had ever seen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your sweet comments.


	11. Nobody puts baby in the corner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte wants to do more and Sidney learns a lesson.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At least the title is from Dirty Dancing :-)

Sun beams played with colors of the little flower in Charlotte’s ring. She sat in the big kitchen with Mary, all four Parker children were outside on a nature treasure hunt, she had made for them. Mary looked at her and knew that trouble was on the way, “What are you thinking of, Charlotte?” Charlotte met her eyes, “Don’t get mad at me, but I need to do something. I love being here, doing things with you and the children, but I cannot just ignore everything that is going on and do nothing.” When she didn’t continue, Mary took her hand and her kind intelligent eyes looked her in the eyes, “What do you have in mind, because you do have an idea already, don’t you?” Charlotte laughed and sketched her thoughts and ideas to Mary. “That is a wonderful idea, Charlotte. What can I do? I feel the same way.” 

Later that day Charlotte called Susan and James, they were in as well. Then she took a deep breath and called Arthur. Mary called Tom. 

“What are you doing here?”, Sidney looked and sounded angry, as he dragged Charlotte into Arthur’s office and framed her with his arms against the wall. They were both in protection gear, he wouldn’t have recognized her if it hadn’t been for her scent and of course the camera. Her eyes were too far away, like a cloudy night and though angry he needed to see the stars and gently pulled of her face shield of and then his own. He repeated his question a little less angry and she met his eyes. Like Mary he knew instantly that this wasn’t a fight he was going to win, but he was damn well going to try. She looked at him with the same determined, curious and intelligent look as the 10-year old Charlotte on the portrait. “I am taking photos for a book. We are trying to solve some of the equipment issues... for this”. She gestured against all the boxes with supplies that were stocked in Arthur’s office. Sidney now looked both angry and puzzled, “Who are ‘we’? His jaw clenched. Her lower lip indicated, that he was getting very close at crossing a line, and he started to feel desperate. “’WE’ are Mary, Susan, James, Arthur and Tom”. The mention of James Stringer sent a pang of jealousy through his body that he knew was both unbecoming and unfair. 

She kept his eyes locked and told him how she wanted to do something too and that she had come up with the idea to make a small book with photos of the men and women fighting every day for their patients and patients fighting to beat the virus – of course only those who could and would consent. Arthur and Tom had given her permission and also provided a list of material and equipment they were running either low on or out of. James had help deconstruct them and made blueprints for download and she had made product photos – a new but fun experience. Mary helped to coordinate. Susan had a contact that could press the books. And when the book was finished, they would send it out to everyone Susan and James could think of. Sidney listened. He hadn’t seen her so excited since before she got ill, it was absolutely terrifying because what if she strained herself and got ill again? 

Sidney started, “But you were so...”, Charlotte interrupted him surprisingly softly, her voice was full of love, “Don’t go there. I know I was ill. I know you took care of me and I can only imagine how frightening that must have been for you. I don’t know what I would do if anything happened to you. But you cannot keep me safe and sound by locking me up. I watch how big a toll this work takes on you, I am so proud of you, and I pull you back every time you come home to me. That is why I didn’t tell you, and that was wrong. I am sorry (she paused). Please don’t expect me to do nothing, it is not who I am. - besides Mary still makes me take naps.” She smiled and kissed him. He stood still for a while. He recalled her parents sending her to martial arts classes, enabling her to stand up to bullies because they knew it would be pointless to tell a warrior and protector not to take action. And Lady Denham who left her the apartment to help her spread her determined and strong wings. Susan who had opened doors because of who Charlotte was as a person and – and even gently had nudged her back in his arms. Even James had done right by both of Charlotte and Sidney. The only one who kept her from being her, was him. Sidney had never felt more like an asshole in his life and he had done some pretty crappy things. This amazing woman in front of him loved him unconditionally. No matter what time of the day he returned to the annex after a shift, no matter how tired or broken down he was, or how tired she was, she guided him back. Even in the middle of the night she would make love to him, when he came home and sought her body, sometimes he would fall asleep during. But she knew he needed to feel her, that she was his home and anchor. In return he was the only one who didn’t enable and support her. He loved her more than anything but he had allowed his fear of losing her overshadow her being her. His body softened and he cupped her face with his hands and gave her a long and lingering kiss, “You are right. Please forgive me. What can I do? Please let me be a part of it.” 

They got lost in each other for a moment, Charlotte panting whispered in his ear, “Well Mr. Moviestar, you would make a very handsome and famous poster boy.” Sidney laughed embarrassed, “Whatever you need.” She picked up her camera and started shooting. His eyes told the story of every patient, shadows of sadness but also an abundance of care and warmth. His face showed the strain of long shifts and the sore marks left by face masks. He was indeed the symbol of the one; the one warrior, that will bring the others back. 

That night he stood under the shower, exhausted, resting his hands against the wall and let the hot water run soothingly down his aching back. He didn’t hear her before she wrapped her soft arms around him from behind and slowly ran her fingers down the warm skin on his body until she reached the silky skin of his instant erection. She stroked him gently and used her body to turn him around facing her. Her tongue swirled hot against his neck, he groaned and lifted her face to kiss her, his hands tried to cover her entire body but soon sought back to their favorite parts; her round perky breasts and the soft skin between her curved buttocks. Her mouth broke the kiss to follow the water down his jaw, neck, chest, nipples... and further down. Her hands stroked him down the sides and her fingers played with the length of him until her tongue had reached its destination. Sidney supported himself the best he could by leaning against the cold tiles, his hands ran through her wet curls and his eyes were fixed on her mouth taking him in, her lips kissing his tip, her tongue licking him from root to tip, before her mouth devoured him again. All the strain of the long days disappeared. There was only Charlotte on her knees with her soft mouth around him. Charlotte ran her hot tongue down a pulsing thick vein, her teeth bit him gently at the root before she sucked her way back again. Her own pleasure was growing and she both wanted to keep him in her mouth and have him inside her. She reached out for the hand shower and let the jet massage her aching and longing bud. Sidney was groaning loudly now alternating his gaze between her mouth sucking on him and her hand giving herself pleasure. He could feel her panting and groaning against him and it was the most arousing thing he had ever seen and it only took one more suck and lick before he came inside her mouth repeating her name. His legs trembled and threatened to collapse under him but he had the perfect view from here; she leaned back against the wall to support herself and to give him free view of her pleasing herself. A few minutes later she orgasmed as well and smiled shyly at him. He picked her up and wrapped a towel around her, “Thank you for letting me watch you. That was beautiful. You are beautiful.” 

The final result of the book was amazing. Stunning black and white photos. Charlotte had asked the people she photographed, “What do you the miss the most?”. She used the quotes to create small stories that went straight to the heart. A close up of a wrinkled hand with a drop captioned “I miss being touched”. A nurse, unrecognizable in protection gear captioned, “I miss my children”. Page by page of small stories told through a photo and “I miss...” There were photos of Tom and his staff working in the lab, the absence of patients didn’t make them less effectful. Charlotte had captured the intense concentration and care they put in their work. After the photos followed product photos of what was needed broken down to components, where to find blueprints and so on. The last two pages was the beautiful and heartbreaking photo of a strained but strong Sidney next to a white page titled “In This Together” and information on how to contribute. 

The involved parties held a small and informal reception in Tom and Mary’s garden, keeping a responsible distance of course. Charlotte was absolutely adorable as she with blushing cheeks and tearful eyes raised her glass and thanked everybody for backing up her idea and pitch in to create this book. Sidney was flooding with pride over his wonderful and caring Charlotte. It was a happy couple of hours before Arthur and Sidney had to drive back to the hospital and Tom headed back to the lab, all of them with a stack of books to show around. 

James had dedicated resources to coordinate and distribute all the contributions. He held great regards for Charlotte and was perhaps still a little in love and did more than his part to carry out her idea. He along with everybody else was overawed by the results. The book had inspired and touched the wealthy recipients and made it easy for them to act by either donating or pick a single component to produce. They received donations for research, some donations were earmarked to treat hospital staff to takeaway. Susan’s suppliers provided reusable protection suits out of excess fabric from last year's collections. James proved to have access to multiple 3D printers in his network and students, engineers and companies' 3D printed components for face shields when the machines weren’t used for daily operation. Just to mention some. James sent Charlotte a small potted tree and congratulated her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, Charlotte is pretty amazing and everything is quite unlikely. But then again we are totally fine with Sidney being both a doctor and an actor :-D


	12. She rides the night next to me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte has news for Sidney.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, finally a title from the song again.

The sun was setting. Sidney stepped in to the small living room of the annex and found Charlotte waiting up for him. Only a few lamps were lit and gave her skin a warm and golden glow. Something in her eyes made him stop, she looked different - was she nervous? Sidney didn’t quite know what to do, only that he felt it was important to not fuck up whatever was happening. She got up and walked the few steps over to him. For the life of him he couldn’t find out what to make of the look in her eyes. Charlotte raised her hand, the little flower sparkled in the lights. “Did you mean this?”, she asked softly. The question caught Sidney completely of guard, “How can you...? Haven’t I...? What do I have to...?” a glimpse of insecurity in her eyes made him stop and he took a deep breath and took her hand with the ring and kissed the back of her hand. His eyes sought hers and he hoped that she could feel the overwhelming love that he had for her. He took the ring of her left ring finger and kissed every finger before he took her other hand and slid the ring on her right ring finger, “In my heart I married you that day - My skin remembers every kiss, every touch and every breath. My fingers know every curve of your body. Your eyes are the stars I navigate by. I know the rhythm of your heartbeat by heart. You surprise me in everything you do and in everything that you are. You are the one. And I promise you now and forever that I will spend every second of my life to make you happy.” Sidney finished his wows by kissing her hand and looked her lovingly in the eyes, he hoped that he had passed whatever test this was. Charlotte’s eyes sparkled with tears and love, she picked something from her pocket and handed it to him. Sidney started to cry, when he saw what it was. “Are you sure, Charlotte?” She handed him a small box. “I took twenty pregnancy tests and they were all positive. Also, Diana has confirmed it.” She smiled, tears running silently from her eyes. “I know what we said that night, but it is soon and the timing is bad with everything that is going on and...” Sidney interrupted her with a kiss, it was soft, slow and lingering like the kiss he had given her in the hallway the night of the gala. “The timing is perfect. What could be more meaningful than this? When?” “December 1st" Sidney did some math in his head, “That means...” he paused, “Yes, that means we were quite effective one of the first times we made love”, Charlotte laughed with blushing cheeks. He cupped her face and kissed her, “Thank you”, he mumbled against her teary cheek. “Can I... can we...is it safe?”, “Make love? Are you sure, you are a doctor, Mr. Parker?”. He laughed embarrassed and carried her to bed, “I will show you I know my way around your anatomy." 

Months passed and though the world looked like it would never be the same again, the virus curve broke, and Sidney had fewer and shorter shifts. Charlotte and Sidney moved back to Sanditon Terrace and started the preparations for the little baby. Charlotte was glowing and Sidney tried his best to keep his hands of Charlotte’s temptingly bigger but also very sore breasts. She could still make him drop everything and carry her to bed, just because of the way she bit her lip or simply breathed. He bought all the books he had loved as a child and read stories to her belly – doing all the voices. Charlotte laughed so hard she began to hiccup. 

The first time Sidney felt the baby kick, he broke down in tears. Actually, Sidney could not remember crying before Charlotte came into his life, and now he could tear up just by watching her sleep in his arms. But then again, he had never felt so much before. 

“I want to try something”, Charlotte said one day and dragged him into her studio. She wore a soft knitted dress, designed by Susan of course. Sidney had noticed how the fabric caressed her curves and breasts. She didn’t notice how hungrily he was looking at her. “Would you move that lamp over there?”, she asked and pointed still looking into her camera and adjusting the flashes. He nodded even though she couldn’t see him and did what he was told. “Stand there, Sidney”, she directed and pointed at a spot on the floor. He obeyed. She did a few shots and looked satisfied. “Perfect, I want to take our picture. Would you mind?” Sidney shook his head, he had after all decided long ago that he was never to deny Charlotte anything. Charlotte set the camera to auto release on the longest and slowest setting. Sidney was concentrated at first and did as instructed, but then he was distracted by the golden skin on her collarbone and he cupped her head and kissed her. It turned out she was easily distracted as well. The camera clicked every few seconds like a slow pulse while Sidney pulled down her dress and unhooked the black delicate silk bra. He kissed his way down her pregnant body and pulled down her briefs with his teeth. She gasped as his breath hit her already wet spot. He noticed and blew until it was hard and peeped out from the dark curls. His mouth kissed her thighs and licked up small drops of her juice, she tasted salty and sweet at the same time. She drove her hands through his hair to touch and to hold her balance. He unbuttoned and pulled of his shirt, she still gasped when she saw his well-trained body, he was beautiful and golden and warm, she was breathing heavier. His hands slid up her legs as he got up on one knee and licked his way up to her lips. She could taste herself on his tongue. Her hands opened his jeans and pulled them down. There he was, saluting her and pulsing slightly, she drove her fingers tenderly along the length, barely touching. Sidney groaned and his tongue danced with her earlobe. He knelt again and gallantly held her hand until she knelt too facing him. Her thighs enveloped him and he moved between them stroking her bud ever so slowly. When he felt he couldn’t wait to be inside her any longer, he sat down and pulled her down his lap and wrapped her legs around him. He leaned back a bit to make room for her belly and used his hand maneuver his cock inside her. She pushed him down on his back and started moving. His fingers teased the sensitive slope down between her buttocks to where they were joined. Her skin was damp and shone like gold when the lamps flashed. It was like watching her move in slow-motion and it was sexy as hell. The pulse in his body beat faster and faster and he started rubbing her. Seconds later she arched her back and pushed herself against his thumb moaning his name. Charlotte went over the edge first; the pulse of her soft walls ignited his orgasm and he roared as she collapsed on top of him. 

Charlotte grew bigger and December 1st got closer and closer. And on November 30th around 11 PM the first contraction pulsed over her lower back. Desperately she called for Sidney who was by her side in light speed. “Easy, Sweetheart, I’ve got you”. He rubbed her back until the pain faded away again and called Diana. “I must say, Charlotte is punctual”, Diana laughed. Sidney was called back by another contraction; he supported and soothed her the best he could. Her curls were getting damp and her cheeks blushed. She was beautiful. After a few more contractions the water broke and Sidney helped her to the bathroom to ease her pain under the hot water in the shower, he supported her while the next contraction came. A little sooner than he had expected. “I’ll call Diana again and then we have to go, Charlotte”, he whispered in her ear. “Five minutes apart”, Charlotte was in a haze of pain but heard him and cried out, “Not anymore, I don’t think there is time!” Sidney threw the phone on the bed and yelled as he ran back to Charlotte, “YOU BETTER COME HER, DIANA!”. Charlotte had her hands on the wall, bend forward and gasped as the contractions hit her. “Do you want to lie down, Charlotte?” Sidney rubbed her back and tenderly pushed her stray curls away from her face. She shook her head, “but could you (another contraction) sit down and support me?”, she panted. He slid under her arms and held her; he could feel the contractions pulsing through her body. His hand went down between her legs to examine her the best he could. “The baby is crowning”, his voice trembled, “Can you hold yourself; I need to go down and...”, she nodded. Sidney turned off the water and knelt before her, so he could still support her with his shoulders. At exactly 00:01 baby Jane, named after Godmother Jane, was born and announced herself to the world with a loud cry. Sidney held her in one arm and helped Charlotte to lie down with the other. They were both crying. “Are you alright, Charlotte my love?” He placed the baby in her arms and went to fetch towels and clamps. While Charlotte admired her daughter, Sidney clamped and cut the cord and gently took his daughter in his arms to examine her. She had pouty lips, a determined expression and the tiniest pink toes, he had never seen anything so perfect and his heart burst open. “You are going to be trouble”, he whispered proudly, “you came into the world like a cannon ball and you look like your mother, I don’t stand a chance, do I?” Baby Jane responded by sucking her pouty lips and search for a nipple. Sidney put her back in Charlotte’s arms and lay down beside his two beautiful girls. The little girl followed her natural instinct to the breast and started sucking with little adorable and satisfied sounds. “I love you. Both”, Sidney whispered and kissed Charlotte on the cheek.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I'm not a trained med. Don't worry, Diana arrives shortly and sorts everything out that Sidney forgot because neither he nor I are an obstetrician.


	13. She's taken my heart – The Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlotte and Sidney travels to Willingden to get married and are in for a big surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are getting closer to an end.

The night Baby Jane was born Sidney asked Charlotte to marry him again – this time in front of their family and friends on the 1-year anniversary of the wedding day in their hearts. Emotionally Charlotte had accepted with a teary “yes” and a kiss, before they both fell asleep with little Jane between them. 

Everyone was excited about the wedding but travelling was still a complicated affair and it wasn’t possible for Charlotte’s parents to travel to New York and Sidney wanted Charlotte to have the wedding in Willingden – the new grandparents had only seen their baby granddaughter through a webcam. He called Stringer who was more than willing to help out, “It can be my wedding present for you”. He even insisted on getting the rest of the Parker clan, Crowe and The Babingtons there. Susan of course was fine by herself. Being new parents with all the hormones, emotions, happiness and fatigue it brought with it, Sidney couldn’t tell Charlotte about the arrangement without crying and Charlotte couldn’t receive the news without crying. They were a fine pair. 

The little family went ahead of the rest of the US based wedding party to spend some time with Charlotte’s family before the wedding and met with James on the same airstrip where Sidney had watched Charlotte board without him. He recalled that day and was happy that he was by her side this time. It was a pleasant flight; Sidney had fallen asleep with his daughter in his arms. The little girl had a firm grip on his finger and tucked her head against his chest. Charlotte melted every time she saw them like this. James couldn’t keep his eyes of Charlotte, she looked radiant in the dimmed light and motherhood had made her even more beautiful. He sighed with knowing it. She could feel his eyes on her and registered the sigh, she looked fondly at him and reached out for his hand, “Thank you for everything you have done for me... for us”, she whispered. After a small pause she continued with a bright smile as if she knew, “I have sisters, you know. And one of them is more than 20”. James laughed quietly slightly flustered and embarrassed. 

It was a small and intimate wedding. Just family and friends. The little church in Willingden was simply decorated with potted trees dotted with tiny light chains. Everything was golden and beautiful. The sun beamed through the stained-glass windows and made kaleidoscope patterns on the floor. Sidney was in stunning a blue suit with beautiful and lifelike made silk Forget-Me-Not-flowers on his reverse, designed by Susan of course. He was pacing nervously in front of the alter, after all they had been through and the wows, they had already made he was surprised that this day meant so much more to him than he had realized. Best men Crowe and Babington laughed at their dear friend and did their best to keep him calm and composed. They were only waiting for the bride. 

The organ started playing softly as the Parker children entered, all dressed in blue. The all had cameras and photographed the wedding guests as they went up the aisle. Sidney didn’t know this and laughed, of course she would do that. Henry caught him perfectly like that. The music continued and the doors opened again and there she was. In a stunning dress made from thick ivory-golden fabric that caressed her curves. Little blue silk Forget-Me-Nots were scattered over the dress. Susan had asked him what he hoped she would look like, and he had answered “Like the portrait of her as a child”. The long sleeves ended in long cuffs and the philosopher bracelet caught the lights. As a clever thing Susan had designed the front so Charlotte could open up and breastfeed but it looked just like a delicate detail with the shoulder line buttoned together allowing a peep to her golden skin. She carried Baby Jane instead of a bouquet, the little girl played with the silk flowers sewn on her dress. Again, a genius detail from Susan, they were meant to be a toy for the little girl’s curious fingers to grab. Sidney started crying when he saw her, she was more beautiful than ever. The organ music stopped as Mr. Heywood and his daughter took the first step. Charlotte looked a bit puzzled but her father padded her hand and gave her a just-wait-for-it-my-dear-look. Crowe waved his hand to get everyone’s attention, “That is my cue! This is for you, Charlotte – from your crying husband”. He sat by a piano, Charlotte hadn’t noticed, and started playing and singing. Slower than the night they had danced to it: 

She's like the wind through my tree  
She rides the night next to me  
She leads me through moonlight  
Only to burn me with the sun  
She's taken my heart  
But she doesn't know what she's done 

Feel her breath on my face  
Her body close to me  
Can't look in her eyes  
She's out of my league  
Just a fool to believe  
I have anything she needs  
She's like the wind 

… 

Tears strolled down Charlotte’s cheeks and she sought Sidney’s eyes. For a moment they were alone and she didn’t notice anyone else as she walked slowly towards him. By the altar Mr. Heywood shook Sidney’s hand, kissed Charlotte on the cheek and took Baby Jane in his arms. The vicar was a family friend of the Heywoods and he gave a beautiful speech dotted with remarks and anecdotes that made them laugh. Charlotte didn’t expect a ring, she was quite happy with the one she had carried so dearly for a year, but Sidney placed a ring with a smaller flower that fitted perfectly with the other ring. “Forge-Me-nots travel in groups”, he whispered. “How did you...?”, Charlotte whispered back. Sidney hadn’t really given any thought to wearing a wedding ring and teared up when Charlotte presented him with a beautiful ring, inside were two small gem flowers embedded, the inscription said, “The one...” Sidney looked at her, “How did you...?” Susan smiled knowingly at the two of them. The guests clapped and cheered when Sidney took his bride in his arms and kissed her with his right arm triumphantly in the air. 

The reception was held at the Heywood estate. It was a wonderful and casual event with speeches and dancing. Mr. Heywood held a warm and very amusing speech with a vivid description of the nervous young man asking for his daughter’s hand in marriage, “and over webcam mind you! Here was a young lad, whom we had never met in person, who didn’t even know if our Charlotte wanted him. What could possibly go wrong for him? (laughter) Mrs. Heywood and I agreed that this must either be the bravest young man ever or a young man so helplessly silly in love that he didn’t need courage. Either way he deserved our blessings because ‘Out of every one hundred men, ten shouldn't even be there, eighty are just targets, nine are the real fighters, and we are lucky to have them, for they make the battle. Ah, but the one, one is a warrior, and he will bring the others back’, right Charlotte?” He winked at his daughter. Sidney blushed and Charlotte laughed with tears in her eyes. 

Sidney’s speech drowned in tears. The second he mentioned the birth of their daughter, he had to give up. He handed her the paper with the speech and composed himself slightly, “You undo me, Woman. You read it later - most of it weren’t suited for an audience anyway”, and then he cupped her face and kissed her slowly and lingering. A perfect kiss. 

Babington and Crowe’s best men speech was a reenactment of Sidney and Charlotte’s first dance together spiced up with anecdotes supported by Crowe on the piano. Charlotte’s cheeks were blushing from laughter and recalling every touch from that evening. It was there she knew that she was in love. 

Their siblings took everyone down memory lane and Sidney and Charlotte, but the biggest surprise was Susan: 

“Dear Charlotte and Sidney. 

I cannot tell you how happy I am to be here today celebrating your love. You know, Lady Denham (Charlotte looked shocked as Susan and her grandmother had never met) was quite sure that you were suited for each other and it annoyed her greatly that she never got to introduce you two. After your last visit in New York, Charlotte, she – I believe the correct term would be – summoned me. She knew she was running out of time and... well to put it like it was, she wanted me to help push you two along. I had never met her before, but I can tell you I was in. When it comes to matters of the heart Lady Denham and I are never wrong - although I hadn’t met you yet, Sidney. 

It turned out that you quickly proved the old lady right. My small contribution was a little dress – I would have invited you as my plus one the day after you called for help, Charlotte. Honestly Sidney, you took your time. Then there was a little hiccup but we sorted that out as well. 

I have here a letter from your Godmother, and I am instructed to read it out loud for you on your wedding day, if of course you married Sidney. And if you turned out to be modern fools living in sin, I was to judge when the time was right. She never said what I was to do, if you two didn’t fall in love with each other. I don’t think she considered it to be a possibility. Not approved by her anyway.” 

Susan smiled and looked at Charlotte before she started reading the letter. Charlotte was already in tears and still processing Susan and Grandmother D cahooting in matchmaking. 

“My dear lovely Charlotte 

I congratulate myself that you are getting married today to Sidney. It gives me great pleasure to know that I am right even from the beyond. Please forgive Susan, she didn’t have a choice. 

My darling girl, I cannot begin to tell you what a joy you have been to me. I do hope you know that. I may be an expert of the heart but not an expert of showing my emotions. But know I loved you dearly. 

Let me tell you about my neighbor, Sidney Parker. The first time I met him, he was drunk and beaten up and tried to lock himself into my apartment with his key. The bloody fool had taken the wrong turn from elevator. Well, you can’t leave an idiot like that alone so I let him in. It turned out that he was quite a pleasing young man. I cannot remember the conversation, but I do remember his eyes. They were kind and it was like looking into your eyes, my dear girl. Anyway, I gave him a key under the pretense that an old lady might need his assistance, but really it was so he could lock himself in next time he got lost. I don’t care much to be woken up at night. 

Over time I got to care a great deal for this young man. Kind, polite and helpful. He popped in at odd hours but I liked that. Eventually. I was quite determined to that you two met. But it never worked out, I am very vexed about that. Sidney Parker, I believe, is a man that will bring you the moon to make you happy. And I do believe that he needs the stars in your eyes. 

I love you both, 

Godmother D 

PS. I didn’t testament everything to asses. Susan knows what to do. “ 

The Heywoods laughed. Testamenting her fortune to asses had always been a standing joke of Lady Denham. 

The room was completely silent, Susan was blushing – a very rare event. Charlotte got up and hugged her with tears in her starry eyes. “She was quite something, your Godmother”, Susan smiled. Charlotte nodded. 

Thankfully Crowe broke the tension in the room and moved to the piano in his normal loud style. He adjusted the seat and cleared his throat. Those who knew him well wondered if he was nervous. “Dear Charlotte and Sidney, it is time for your first dance as Mr. and Mrs. Parker and I have prepared a song for you. I am already wondering what to perform next year when you get married again, it looks like a tradition”. Everybody laughed and Sidney took Charlotte’s hand and followed her to the dance floor. Crowe's voice was beautiful, dark, and a bit husky. 

"Watching every motion  
In my foolish lover's game  
On this endless ocean  
Finally lovers know no shame  
Turning and returning  
To some secret place inside  
Watching in slow motion  
As you turn around and say  
Take my breath away  
Take my breath away

Watching I keep waiting  
Still anticipating love  
Never hesitating to become the fated ones  
Turning and returning  
To some secret place to hide  
Watching in slow motion  
As you turn to me and say  
Take my breath away

Through the hourglass I saw you  
In time you slipped away  
When the mirror crashed I called you  
And turned to hear you say  
If only for today  
I am unafraid  
Take my breath away  
Take my breath away

Watching every motion  
In this foolish lover's game  
Haunted by the notion  
Somewhere there's a love in flames  
Turning and returning  
To some secret place inside  
Watching in slow motion  
As you turn my way and say

Take my breath away"

“You still take my breath away”, Sidney whispered in her ear. His mouth was warm and oh so near and she could feel his hand on her back burn through the fabric. Charlotte’s eyes were brighter than ever, it was like looking at a night sky beaming with shooting stars. Their lips met in a lingering kiss. 

Diana started a playlist and dragged Crowe to the dance floor. Sidney went to his father in law standing with a very tired but also very entertained little Baby Jane, “May I cut in?” Her big eyes sought his, he was so happy and tried to take the day in as he danced quietly with his little daughter in his arms. It had been just perfect. Charlotte was captured by James who turned out to be a brilliant dancer and – Sidney had to admit - still a perfect gentleman. Henry bowed politely to Charlotte’s mother who smilingly accepted. Esther and Babington looked very much in love while Susan was laughing heartily over something Tom said. Georgiana, the dark-skinned beauty was a head taller than her husband. Somehow it made sense when you saw them together. 

Charlotte disappeared for a while to breastfeed Baby Jane, who was going to sleep between her grandparents. Mr. Heywood was absolutely in love with the little girl and she had spent most of the evening in his arms. Charlotte’s sisters had turned the biggest guestroom into a beautiful bridal suite. They left the party with blushing cheeks and went upstairs. Baby Jane and her grandparents turned in as well. Mary and Tom tucked in the four Parker children and went back to the party who danced and partied until the bright morning. James Springer found out that Charlotte was not the only woman with big brown beautiful eyes. 

The buttons on the back of Charlotte’s wedding dress were small and plenty. Sidney tried his best to undress his bride but every inch of her naked skin unveiled needed to be kissed or licked. Charlotte enjoyed his warm fingers and lips on her skin. She tilted her head to tempt him with her long neck. The dress fell heavily to the floor like it was revealing a beautiful Greek statue. Sidney suspected that Susan had designed it to do so. Her bra went the same way and then she turned around and Sidney gasped. Instead of a garter, Susan had designed a pair of briefs held together over the dark curls by a blue silk bow. Sidney’s mouth went dry and his gaze turned dark. “Do not open yet”, Charlotte bit his earlobe and unbuttoned his white shirt. She let her fingers trace his muscles as she pulled the shirt of him. His arousal was palpable and she made sure to stroke him with her abdomen. Her hands moved down his skin again and caressed the bump in his pants before they opened them, taking for ever to pull the zipper down, her finger trailing his length. Sidney was moaning. When he was naked, she kissed him and lay down on the bed, “Now you may open”. Now it was his turn to take his time. He blew hot air on the wet spot and sucked a little on her bud before he slowly pulled the bow with his teeth. Charlotte gasped. His tongue drew hearts on her belly and he kissed her breasts and sucked a little, Charlotte laughed “If you don’t want tea with that milk, you better stop”, Sidney grunted, “Well then, I better find other things to suck”, and he started with her earlobes, her plump lips, her collarbone before he trailed his way back to jewel in the dark alluring curls. It was a bliss to be able to take their time. With a little girl it wasn't always an option, but taking Charlotte up the wall had its attraction too. And Sidney took his time, it drove Charlotte crazy. She tried to pace but he only broke away from licking her and looked her in the eyes with a mischievous look. “Are you in a hurry, Sweetheart?”. He should never have said that, her strong legs somehow pulled him around and she straddled him triumphantly. Sidney wanted to keep teasing her, but he was outnumbered by Charlotte and his eager cock jumping inside her as if she was a magnet. She whispered, “Fast or slow?” Before he could answer his hands had grasped her waist and he started moving in her. Her skin was getting damp and it glowed in the candle lights, she was out of this world. Her curls bounced as she moved on him and he could feel the ends tickle him where they were joined, when she arched her back. It was going too fast, he wanted this to last longer and pulled her up until her glistening sex was right above his mouth. Her thighs framed his head and he had a perfect view to her breasts and her white teeth biting her lips as he licked her. He could feel the tip of him seeking her wet cave like a twig searching for water and he pulled her back down his body again. Her juices covered his chest and stomach. Charlotte was running out of patience and steered back on top of him and the look in her eyes told him he was in trouble now. Without moving she squeezed him, gentle at first, squeezing and releasing, squeezing and releasing. She sat completely still but her walls fucked him by squeezing him and the orgasm hit him like an avalanche. He couldn’t breathe or moan, his mouth was open but not a breath nor a sound. Every drop of blood, breath, groan and vibrant pulse had been extracted and absorbed by her strong hot center. She still didn’t move, she waited until he was able to release the breath he was holding and then she moved against him. “Touch me, Sidney”, she moaned. And he did, he knew exactly how, she arched her back to give him space to please her. It didn’t take long and she collapsed on top of him. “Don’t move”, he whispered and wrapped his arms around her. “I couldn’t if I wanted to”. They fell asleep like until a part of Sidney, an early riser, started moving again.

Charlotte's breast were getting sore and tense with milk and she went to get Baby Jane. "This is for you and your eyes only", she said as she handed him a gift. Sidney looked surprised at her, as she left the room with a knowing smile. That woman was an enigma. He opened the beautifully wrapped gift. Inside was a photo album bound in luxurious grey suede, he blushed when he turned the cover, the photos showed him and a pregnant Charlotte making love on the floor in her studio. The black and white photos were stunning and sensual, some of them a little blurry. The last photo showed Charlotte arching her back away from the camera. Her sweat glistening breasts sparkled in the flash lights. Dark curls showed were the were joined. He was raising his head and admiring her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Take my breath away" by Berlin.  
> I forgot a little something in the end. It is there now.
> 
> I think we need an epilogue to wrap things up nicely. Bow and all.


	14. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little bit of wrapping up the story of Charlotte and Sidney.

Lady Denham left everything to Charlotte. The will was as a precise reflection of the old somewhat eccentric lady, Charlotte, Sidney and the solicitor burst out laughing more than once, but the end of it was that Charlotte was to do with it all as she liked within the following clauses: 

Sanditon Terrace were to stay in the family. (Charlotte didn’t know that Grandmother D owned the entire building)  
Charlotte were to keep the apartment  
Charlotte and Sidney were to consider the family home she had bought them.  
Lady Denham wanted to be remembered with a plaque or something, Charlotte was to find out what, how and where, “but not a bloody bench in a park”  
Lady Denham had never been a fan of charity but Charlotte was to remedy that  
Buy an ass for the milk  
Keep photographing  
And then there was a note for Sidney. “If you hurt her, I will stand up from my grave and chase you down.” (Sidney believed she would) 

Most of them were quite easy to come around. The family home was perfect, spacious without being pretentious, a big unfussed garden with old trees and bushes and a lake nearby. “It’s like being in Willingden”, Charlotte gasped with tears in eyes and squeezed Sidney’s hand. Baby Jane’s big brown eyes sparkled at the sun flickering through the fresh new leaves and she tried to catch a sun beam dancing on her father’s chest. Sidney kissed her, “You were right, she did know you better than anyone”. Charlotte kept her studio at Sanditon Terrace and it was nice to have place nearby. Crowe and Diana who had been inseparable since the wedding moved into Sidney’s apartment. 

Charlotte and Sidney gave a significant amount to epidemic research, not just COVID19 among other charity donations. 

None of them were very keen on having an ass but Charlotte came up with a rather clever idea that the solicitor laughingly validated; a lifetime sponsorship of the ass at the local zoo. A beautiful and rather pretentious brass plaque was made and ornamented the ass enclosure: 

“In loving memory of Lady Jane Victoria Denham  
January 16th 1933 – June 6th 2019  
A great believer in the healing powers of ass' milk” 

The portrait 10-year old Charlotte had taken of her godmother was engraved below the text. The zoo held a fine reception with cake and lemonade and taste samples of asses milk for the brave. It was a lovely day. 

James Stringer had longer and frequent trips to England, not only for business. The beautiful brown eyes of Charlotte’s younger sister, Alison, pulled like a magnet. He was very much in love and tried his best to be a gentleman and not to come on too strong until one late evening Alison hijacked his goodnight kiss and bit him in the earlobe and whispered, “Enough, just make love to me already”. 

The Parker clan plus friends met every year for thanksgiving at Mary and Tom’s. And they still played football in the afternoon. And Charlotte and Sidney still targeted each other. Sidney with a thrilled Jane on his broad shoulders. 

Susan finally met someone, the circumstances of their relationship was very hush hush but they had a confidential sanctuary centered around Charlotte and Sidney. 

Never had you seen a prouder father than Sidney. He loved being at home with Jane and Charlotte and announced through his press agent that he would be on maternity leave indefinitely. Women's magazines swooned over the way this famous hunk of father and husband treated the two women in his life. Tabloids lost interest surprisingly quickly – probably because of the absence of scandal. Eliza Campion tried to spread poison about the family bliss in an interview but it backfired. All in all, Sidney was happy with his life as it was and struggled to see a future as an actor. Acting would mean months away from his family, sure he could bring them with him, but at some point, Jane would have an everyday life of her own, and he did not want Charlotte’s life to be an appendix to his career. He talked to Charlotte about his thoughts one night in bed, she was very occupied kissing the soft bronzed skin on his abs and didn’t listen at first but something in his voice made her look up and seek his eyes. “If you love acting, Sidney, we will find a way. If you want to be a doctor again, we will find a way. No matter what you want to do to be happy, we will find a way, as long as you come home to us every night”. She had changed position and wrapped her legs around him and looked him lovingly in the eyes. Sidney followed the stars in her eyes and suddenly making love to her seemed like the happy option. The next day he was reading to Jane, doing all the voices. She was bursting with laughter and her little body trembled with joy. Charlotte came in to the room and lifted her hand with the two beautiful rings, “Did you mean this?” Sidney looked confused at first but then the penny dropped, “Are you...?” tears were already rolling down his cheeks into the soft brown curls on his daughter's head. Charlotte nodded happily. Later that day Sidney called his agent, and over the next years Sidney voice-acted in a number of animated movies and he loved it. He and Charlotte had 3 more children, a girl named after Susan, and a set of twin boys named after their grandfathers, William and Adam. All of them with galaxies in their big brown eyes. Every time Sidney welcomed a newborn child, he would whisper, “You are going to be trouble. You came into the world like a cannon ball and you look like your mother, I don’t stand a chance, do I?” 

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the sweet comments. It has been a fun guilty pleasure to write this very first piece of fan fiction.


End file.
